Monday, February 29, 2016

Tell Your Truth

Tell Your Truth

 Giving candid feedback can be difficult for anyone, especially first-time managers who are afraid of damaging relationships with those who used to be their peers.

But it’s essential that new managers learn how to balance candor with care, and when done properly, it can be tremendously freeing and empowering to both parties. The purpose of telling your truth is to create clarity and drive purposeful action toward accomplishing the goal.

When the first two steps, listening to learn and inquiring for insight, are done well, it builds confidence and creates a safe environment where trust and respect flourish.

 When sharing your truth, be brave, honest, and respectful. Be open to other perspectives and focus on forward movement while being careful to avoid blame or judgment.

Sunday, February 28, 2016

Draw others out

Inquire for Insight

 Great managers draw their people out.

They ask questions that allow their people to share insights and ideas that can benefit projects, tasks, and the team in general. Asking open-ended questions helps the manager better understand the motivations of team members and what drives their behavior.

 When inquiring for insight, keep the conversation focused on moving forward, not the past. Emphasize “what” and “how” questions rather than “why,” which can sound judgmental and make people defensive.

 The goal is to draw others out, not shut them down.

Saturday, February 27, 2016

Make 'em laugh

Though the world is so full of a number things,
I know we should all be as happy as
But are we?
No, definitely no, positively no.
Decidedly no. Mm mm.
Short people have long faces and
Long people have short faces.
Big people have little humor
And little people have no humor at all!
And in the words of that immortal buddy
Samuel J. Snodgrass, as he was about to be lead
To the guillotine:
Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Don't you know everyone wants to laugh?
(Ha ha!)
My dad said "Be an actor, my son
But be a comical one
They'll be standing in lines
For those old honky tonk monkeyshines"

Lyrics from Donald O'Connor from Singing in the Rain

Friday, February 26, 2016

Listen to Learn

Listen to Learn

Listening is one of the most important skills for any manager, not just those new to the role. Purposeful and effective listening helps your people feel valued and heard, and it build trust in your leadership abilities. I like to encourage new managers to listen with the intent to be influenced.
Too many times we think we already know the answer or we’re formulating our response instead of listening to learn something new or to have our mind changed.

Listen more than you talk and don’t be afraid to sit in a few moments of awkward silence (it’s really not as long as you think). The silence will actually serve as a prompt for the other person to more fully express himself.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Helping hand

Lyrics from a Lionel Richie song..

As we go down
Life's lonesome highway
Seems the hardest thing to do
Is to find a friend or two
That helping hand
Someone who understands
That when you feel you lost your way
You've got someone there to say,
I'll show you

So you think you know the answers, oh no
Well the whole world's got you dancing
That's right, I'm telling you
It's time to start believing, oh yes
Believing who you are, you are a shining star

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

After all is said

After all is said and done with how technology is taking over it still comes down to your word.

Even with all the computer programs there are and how much more we can do things at a faster pace to have true success and to have inner peace it still comes down to one simple thing..your word.

Your word to yourself as much as to others.
When you do not hold up to your own expectations to that voice in your head you are not holding up to your word..your word to yourself to be better, to do better.

When you promise someone that you will do something and do not follow through you are not keeping your word.
You do that enough times and your reputation will proceed you.

Your word is your bond and no matter where you go and how you color it- you cannot run from it -because you cannot run from YOU.

So you can learn new computer programs, buy the latest gadgets and shine up your toys all you want but in the end it is still simply YOUR WORD that will make you who you are.

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

The definition of TEAM-

A team is a group of people  linked in a common purpose.

A group does not necessarily constitute a team.
 Teams normally have members with complementary skills and generate synergy through a coordinated effort which allows each member to maximize their strengths and minimize their weaknesses.
Team members need to learn how to help one another, help other team members realize their true potential, and create an environment that allows everyone to go beyond his or her limitations. Teams can be broken down into from a huge team or one big group of people, even if these smaller secondary teams are temporary.
A team becomes more than just a collection of people when a strong sense of mutual commitment creates synergy, thus generating performance greater than the sum of the performance of its individual members.

Monday, February 22, 2016

Turn the other cheek

The definition of- turn the other cheek
  1. 1.
    refrain from retaliating when one has been attacked or insulted.
“Turning the other cheek” is not blanket acceptance of brutality. It is a strategy for motivating others to change. If you meet evil with evil and blow for blow, the cycle of vengeance will never end. The twenty-first century “War on Terror” is going to become the latest example of this forgotten lesson if its strategy remains “slaughter those who slaughter.” Violence will beget violence unless someone is strong enough to rise above.
Nelson Mandela knows how “peaceful subversion” works. It doesn’t happen quickly. It takes an inordinate amount of courage and character. For Mandela it took 27 years in a prison on Robin Island. But eventually the Apartheid’s treatment of black South Africans brought them universal shame. The world could no longer allow the Apartheid to continue its reign after witnessing so many stark examples of extreme brutality and injustice. Mandela and the resistance did not fight back. They did not silently submit to an existence of inhumane treatment. They stood up. They raised their voice. They took it on the chin and in so doing demonstrated the inhumanity of their aggressors. An entire country is different because they did.
 
 
In our day-to-day, it may mean responding with kind and selfless words when a boss has come on the attack with accusatory and thoughtless one-liners. You follow up his attack with a stop by his office where you compliment his demonstrated strengths. You show him how to empower someone thoughtfully so that he sees the contrast between his diminutive assault and your perceptive edification.
You don’t fire back with a cheap shot.
You step back into his space with love. He may just fire away again, but he might also become aware of his heartlessness.
Don’t expect it to work immediately. It took Nelson Mandela 27 years in prison.

Saturday, February 20, 2016

It starts with you

I hear it all the time..
Too bad it ain't like the old days
Why don't people help each other more
Why do people gossip or slander

It simple..it starts with you.
Try it..
Extend that olive branch first..ask if you can help or better yet just jump in and help.

If someone says something to hurt you or anger you tell that person and tell them that you can understand their frustration and that maybe they just miss understood-
Try it.. it starts with you.
Rather then keep it inside and start talking negative about that person- confront them and the sooner the better.
Do not come at them yelling or in anger- talk- explain your feelings and your side.
Now you may say why bother- you bother because deep down YOU care and if you don't it will just fester.

And here is the cool thing, when you are honest and sincere it will start to take down the walls and you may even gain another ally and friend.

Remember- everybody has a story - maybe they were burnt or hurt so they react the way they do.

Try not to judge- extend that olive branch !

Try it..it starts with you !



Friday, February 19, 2016

The George Costanza theory

There is a Seinfeld for everything.
One episode had George Costanza at work and he realized that if he acted really busy and complained about his workload to people they would not give him work.
He worked in a small office with a door so when people came in he would automatically go into his " Oh my God I am sooooo busy  " mode. The person would listen to him and see him throwing his hands in the air and just apologize and leave. Right after they closed the door he would put his feet back on the desk.
That is the George Costanza theory .

Unfortunately I see this every day in the work place. I guess it works, sooner or later people stop going to that person. Meanwhile the poor bastard who never complains gets piled on.
Crazy huh?

I learned to not fall for that trick a long time ago.
I gravitate and reward those that just do their job and never complain.

In the long run they do get rewarded and the George's of the world are discovered.
Even George on Seinfeld was found out.. nice try.


Thursday, February 18, 2016

Power and Money

Power and Money..

These two things have brought down the mightiest of nations and the best businesses.

Poor men want to be rich..Rich men want to be kings.
A line from a Bruce Springsteen song.

Listen to your junk man..he's singing.
Lyrics from another Springsteen song.

Who is really happy ? The man always chasing the almighty dollar and the man who ejoys every day and is thankful for what he has?

I have seen people climb the ranks, come in just wanting a chance, a opportunity and a paycheck. From there some just want more and lose track of where they came from , they just want more.
Then they get so obsessed they start wanting what others have and they get angry at other people and what THEY make and WHAT they have.

Power and money .. starts to take over and rule their every day and slowly but surely they lose themselves and lose what they have to be thankful for.

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

People

“People are wonderful. I love individuals. I hate groups of people. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. 'Cause pretty soon they have little hats. And armbands. And fight songs. And a list of people they're going to visit at 3am. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking.”

George Carlin

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Debate

We recently loss Supreme court justice Anthony Scalia.
Anthony Scalia absolutely loved vigorous debate because he believed in the power of reasoning.

That is what is missing in today's politics and in today business world.
We need to be to debate , to listen and exchange ideas.

To many times people feel threatened in the work place and are afraid to speak up.
Grant you because we have loss the art of debate sometimes people come at you wrong and are angry therefore it never gets to the debate level.

One of Anthony Scalia's ( a conservative ) best friends was another Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg ( a liberal ) and they may have disagreed on many important topics they also agreed on many and enjoyed the debate.

Another supreme court justice Susan Day O'Connor said the secret is to learn to disagree agreeably .

It is ok to disagree, it is healthy to disagree.
That is how we learn, that is what sharpens our side of the debate.

Monday, February 15, 2016

Until We All Win


There was a farmer who grew excellent quality corn. Every year he won the award for the best grown corn. One year a newspaper reporter interviewed him and learned something interesting about how he grew it. The reporter discovered that the farmer shared his seed corn with his neighbors. “How can you afford to share your best seed corn with your neighbors when they are entering corn in competition with yours each year?” the reporter asked.

“Why sir,” said the farmer, “Didn’t you know? The wind picks up pollen from the ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If my neighbors grow inferior corn, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must help my neighbors grow good corn.”

So is with our lives... Those who want to live meaningfully and well must help enrich the lives of others, for the value of a life is measured by the lives it touches. And those who choose to be happy must help others find happiness, for the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...
-Call it power of collectivity...
-Call it a principle of success...
-Call it a law of life.
The fact is, none of us truly wins, until we all win!!

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Energy and time

There is only so much energy and time in one day..how you choose to use it is up to you.

I would try to explain to employees that if they spent the time they spent talking about how much they dislike something or gossiping about others and just concentrated on how to do their job better they would be much happier and more successful.

When a person decides to air their dirty laundry on social media that should tell you all you need to know.
I get it- it can be entertaining I guess but that is all it is- just like reality TV-

I never believed in having to defend somebody or myself or my company to others, especially to people that are not even involved in the situation first hand. Frankly- it is no one else's business.

Know that there is ALWAYS another side and sometimes it can be personal and I would never share that but know that there are other sides to every story.

But the point is if you are not directly involved why waste what little time and energy you may have on it ?

Take that time, YOUR TIME-  to see how you can improve YOUR paperwork- your communication- new tools that may help you do YOUR job.

Be positive and worry about YOUR house and watch the reality TV if you wish but remember it is just entertainment.

Saturday, February 13, 2016

Live Life

I recently had a family member pass away and once again it reminded me that we are just visiting and we all never know what day is going to be our last.
Death has a way of reminding us of that.
The gentlemen that passed away was my brother in law, he was 67 years old with a wife, 2 kids and 4 grandkids and he loved them all.
He was also a Vietnam Vet and coached little league for many years.
I only knew him after the Vietnam years and from what I heard about him I think the war changed him. It made him a harder man and he certainly would let you know what he thought about other people or about anything.
He was never worried about being politically correct.
It took me years to start to understand him and I am not sure that I ever really got him..till the end.
He had a heart the size of Texas and he adored kids.
He has a odd since of humor at times and sometimes he may have been the only one in on the joke.
As with a lot of people at appear rough he was kind of sensitive and I think he got his feelings hurt at times and would just shut that person down- again all part of whatever was in his past.
He had a tough childhood growing up and watched his dad suffer and die at a young age and that may have played into his persona too.
We are complicated creatures at times but then again we are pretty simplistic- we all need to be loved.
If you befriended him he was a friend for life.
He loved sports then when his youngest granddaughter was born with a heart issue and required several surgeries he understood the true hero's are people like the doctor's that operated at that little girl. I think that also helped to puncture that hard exterior.
We are all what we are for many reasons - in the end it is a lot easier if you just try not to judge.
Live Life like it may be your last day..cause you just never know.

Friday, February 12, 2016

Thin Skin

It still amazes me after over 40 year in business that people have such thin skin.
I can forgive the youngins but after you been through the rodeo so many times you would think that one would learn .
The crazy thing is I have learned that the higher up the person or bigger the so called title the thinner the skin.
A person I worked with years ago was a ex navy guy and he tried not to let things bother him he would say just think of it like water off a duck's back- just let it roll off.

The other thing I noticed is that when these thin skinned people react it is because there is normally some truth to it.
The trick is to LISTEN...and try to not to react in the moment.
Take time to think about it, remember everything does not have to be considered an assault on you or your character- even if it perceived that way or put forth that way.
Remember they are reacting also and maybe their feelings are hurt or someone planted a rotten seed with them and they took the bait.

In order to be happy or succeed in life you need to grow tough skin.
Let it roll off your back.

This too shall pass..

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Nomad

 The definition of a - no·mad-
 
ˈnōˌmad/
noun
a member of a people having no permanent abode, and who travel from place to place to find fresh pasture for their livestock.


  • a person who does not stay long in the same place; a wanderer.
     
 
 
 
 
 

Here is the challenge with today's work force in particular professional drivers-
No one stays anywhere long enough to work out the kinks the relationship and to build bonds- they are NOMADS.
 
The problem is as in any relationship sometimes it takes time and like in any relationship there will be rocky roads.
I believe that sooner or later you need to find a home and plant your feet.
Work through the problems, keep up your end , in the best of relationships there are times that you must be the bigger person or go the extra mile. The other person will notice and return that trust- thus creating a bond.
 
Give it time- work at it- plant your feet .

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

More tips to help with anger issues

6. Stick with 'I' statements

To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only increase tension — use "I" statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, "I'm upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes," instead of, "You never do any housework."

7. Don't hold a grudge

Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation. It's unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want at all times.

8. Use humor to release tension

Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help you face what's making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things worse.

9. Practice relaxation skills

When your temper flares, put relaxation skills to work. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as, "Take it easy." You might also listen to music, write in a journal or do a few yoga poses — whatever it takes to encourage relaxation.

10. Know when to seek help

Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Ready to get your anger under control?

Ready to get your anger under control? Start by considering these 10 anger management tips.

1. Think before you speak

In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something you'll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to do the same.

2. Once you're calm, express your anger

As soon as you're thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.

3. Get some exercise

Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.

4. Take a timeout

Timeouts aren't just for kids. Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to handle what's ahead without getting irritated or angry.

5. Identify possible solutions

Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child's messy room drive you crazy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night? Schedule meals later in the evening — or agree to eat on your own a few times a week. Remind yourself that anger won't fix anything and might only make it worse.

More tomorrow

Monday, February 8, 2016

Professionalism and Respectfulness

Professionalism

Being professional involves everything from how you dress and present yourself in the business world to the way you treat others. Professionalism is such a broad category, in fact, that it basically encompasses all the other elements of a strong work ethic.

Respectfulness

You display grace under pressure: No matter how tight the deadline or heated the tempers, you always remain poised and diplomatic. Whether you’re serving a customer, meeting with a client or collaborating with colleagues, you do your best to respect everyone’s opinions, especially under trying circumstances. This shows you value people’s individual worth as well as their professional contributions.

Sunday, February 7, 2016

It's complicated

Life is complicated.

People are complicated.

You cannot go through this world without making a lot of mistakes you just hope that you can reflect on them and learn.
You are constantly learning.
When people or loved ones pass we have a tendency to always say what a nice or special person they were. Now we all may be aware of their frailties or failures but you overlook those because we all have them.
What was the finish product?
What did they leave behind?
It is very important to never judge others because we rarely know what the back stories are and frankly it should not matter. That said if we do know someone's history it may explain why they react the way they do in certain situations.

My brother in law who just passed was never politically correct and pretty much said it like it was, or at least as he saw it.
He hurt some feelings along the way and sure he could have said things different at times or not say anything but that was him.
What he did have was a big heart.
His family came first.
His rough exterior hid a sensitive person who had been hurt and burnt in the past and his mechanism to deal with things was to hit first.

His finish product in this life was a army full of kids and adults who's life he touched.

He left behind a loving wife, two kids and four grandkids that loved him dearly.

Life and people can be complicated, don't waste time judging . Spend more time looking for the good.

Thursday, February 4, 2016

Zero Talent


The first 15 minutes

For our household good drivers the first 15 minutes when you arrive at a residence to pack or load will determine your success or failure with that particular customer.
What you say, what you do and even how you look MATTERS.

First and most important- BE ON TIME

Remember the customer's name and use it

Be in uniform

Introduce your self and hand them a business card, if you have any labor with you be sure to introduce them also.

Walk the house and LISTEN to the customer- listen to what is important to THEM.

Be positive !

Smile- leave your personal problems at home-

Begin to prep the house, floors, staircases, walls etc

Remember YOU alone can set the tone for the entire move.

Keep in mind that moving is one of the most stressful things that a person goes through. Most times they are leaving friends and maybe family and if their is children they may be changing schools. They are dealing with banks and realtors and financials.. all very stressful.   

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Determination and Accountability

Determination

You don’t let obstacles stop you, and enthusiastically embrace challenges like a mountain climber who ascends higher and higher until the summit is reached.
You know that your job as an entrepreneur is to solve your clients’ problems, and you resolve to continually seek better and more innovative answers.
With purpose and resilience, you push ahead, no matter how far you have to go.

Accountability

You take personal responsibility for your actions and outcomes in every situation, and avoid making excuses when things don’t go as planned.

 You admit your mistakes and use them as learning experiences so you won’t make the same ones again.

 You also expect your crews to meet the same high standards, and support those who accept responsibility instead of blaming others.

Monday, February 1, 2016

Dependability and Dedication

Dependability

You can be relied on to keep your promises.
 You are always on time and prepared , and deliver your work on schedule as promised.
Your reputation for reliability precedes you because you’ve proven over time that customers, clients and colleagues can trust you to do everything you say you will. In an uncertain world, your customers, colleagues and clients will appreciate the stability you embody.

Dedication

You don’t stop until the job is done, and done right. “Good enough” is not good enough for you and your team.

You aim for "outstanding" in everything you do.

You put in the extra hours to get things right, giving attention to detail and devotion to excellence. Your passion shows in how hard you work and the results you achieve.