Stay Calm and Carry On

Stay calm and carry on... easier said than done sometimes but certainly words to try to live by.

Life will always throw you curve balls and as drivers traveling through different cities and towns and States, working with different people daily and dealing with people at possibly their most stressful time you certainly know this.
And for those that work in a office environment or manage people you know this also,  every day is an adventure. To be successful and more important to be happy you need to learn to roll with it.

Take a breath and try not to act out or have knee jerk reactions. Again easier said than done but I believe similar to a athlete that relies on muscle memory you can train your brain on how to react.

It all comes down to habit. When you do over react try to recognize it and learn from it.
We are only human , we will have days that you get frustrated quicker than others but again try to recognize those days and talk slower, take a break and remember to watch your breathing.
May sound silly but it works.
When you get worked up your rate increases and you breath faster and you react different.

Do the best you can and back away and think about the situation before you react. You will be better for it.

Stay calm and carry on.

The 7 Secrets of Highly Happy People

Secret #5

Highly happy people realize the importance of being open to others rather than shutting down.

Humans are social creatures, and happy people tend to have strong bonds of friendship and closeness with family and friends. They seek support in good times and bad. Their network increases with passing years, valuing seasoned relationships while opening themselves up to new ones. They value relationships and do not take them for granted. They find they feel best when helping and giving to others, and allow others to help them, too.
The one thing that highly happy people do not do is to spend much energy trying to protect themselves from being hurt. Rather, they have enough confidence in themselves that looking to others for warmth, comfort and support has more potential to make them stronger, not weaker. They trust others, but realize the foundation for trusting others is trusting themselves. Using the analogy of a being a passenger on a rowboat in the middle of a lake, you will be more likely to trust the person rowing if you can swim.

Secret #6

Highly happy people are not bitter, but get better by forgiving. 

Realizing the difference between condoning behavior and forgiving it, they don’t hold grudges because bitterness only hurts them – not the other person. They have long accepted the notion that people can only be as healthy as they are inside, and can not give you what they don’t have to give. It’s like expecting a door to be a chair, and expecting to get eggs at a hair salon. It just won’t happen.
They observe too many wasted years that people spend wishing, expecting, condemning and being angry because their loved ones, co-workers, friends and society can’t give them what they want or deserve. Rather than getting caught in the way others and even life itself ‘should’ be, they adjust their expectations, and let go of the rest. Sometimes that entails setting much better limits with toxic people in their lives, and in the case of abuse, to discontinue a relationship altogether.
Highly happy people extend the courtesy of forgiveness also to themselves, and forgive themselves for not knowing then what they do now.  

Secret #7

Highly happy people live life looking and moving forward, not backwards. 

Highly happy people learn from the past, they don’t live in it. They don’t get stuck in ‘woulda, coulda, shoulda’ thinking. They forgive themselves for not having the foresight to have what is now so obvious in hindsight. Instead of focusing on wondering, “Why,” they focus on, “What’s next?” They also do not live wishing for the ‘good old days’. They are too busy making memories now to live in the old ones, no matter how good they were. Old snapshots have a place in life, but they don’t want to be stuck there.  Powered by yesterday, with an eye on the future, today becomes the place to live.

Imagine yourself driving a car. You would not get very far driving through the rear view mirror!

The 7 Secrets of Highly Happy People

Secret #3

Highly happy people fully realize that there are some things they will never get over.

People who are highly happy don’t expect life to always go smoothly, and realize that life’s happiness does not go on without interruptions: that in fact, a full life has times of great sadness. They are the last people to tell others to, “Get over it,” and are also patient with themselves in navigating through challenging times. They realize that there are some things so terrible in life that the best we can do is get through. They regard life-altering events – such as death of a loved one, a huge failure or career setback, relationship break ups, health challenges and life altering disabilities – as some of the issues that sever life into “before” and “after.” Rather than rail against life’s injustice, highly happy people learn that there still can be beauty and happiness after loss. They refuse to let major setbacks define the rest of their lives, and they find beauty on the other side of even a major trauma and loss. In essence, they deepen rather than weaken.

Secret #4

Highly happy people know the difference between ‘denial’ and ‘optimism’.

Highly happy people are not ones to live in denial when things bother them, but rather they are open and honest to themselves and others, and do not hide from themselves or their feelings. They have confidence in themselves that they can make a positive spin on almost anything that happens, without pretending to feel something they don’t. Rather than shrugging their feelings off, or pretending that they don’t care, they address their feelings and thoughts head on. Instead of blocking difficult thoughts and feelings with a ‘don’t worry about it’ mentality, they have faith in themselves to work though difficult feelings and find a lesson or silver lining. They don’t have ‘all or nothing’ thinking where they either gloss over their feelings or judge or berate themselves for feeling down. They focus more on how they get up after falling rather than how they fell down. They tend to ask themselves, “What did I learn?” Rather than, “What was I thinking?” 

The 7 Secrets of Highly Happy People

Secret #1

Highly happy people stop looking on the outside for what they need to find within. 

They understand material things, and even people, could never be the key to their happiness. While they realize the importance of loving and supportive relationships, they never expect to find themselves in someone else, and never lose themselves trying to find someone else. In fact, highly happy people realize that over-dependence on others is actually the fast track to unhappiness and even relationship problems. They know that depending on others for happiness can be the source of unimaginable conflict, bitterness, blame and perpetual disappointment.
Highly happy people also are not fooled that ‘things’ -  such as fancy cars, expensive clothes and posh vacations – are the places where true happiness is found. They know all too well that when you base your happiness on mostly outside things, you can still feel empty within.

Secret #2

Highly happy people really, really like themselves.

Happy people have a foundation of self-love. Those who listen to negative messages in their head that they are not “smart enough,” attractive enough,” “lovable enough” and just plain not “good enough” end up spending their lives wanting to be someone else. Rather than be the best they can be, unhappy people spend futile time comparing themselves to others.
On the other hand, happy people would agree that it is wiser to compare themselves only to themselves and measure their progress over where they were yesterday. Yet, they are not unrealistic and expect their self-love to improve in a straight line.
Happy people know that comparing self-worth to others is risky business – there will always be someone wealthier, prettier, more popular, with smarter kids, better jobs and nicer cars. They realize that if you measure yourself against someone else’s yardstick, you will always come up short. Therefore, instead of trying to be like someone they admire, they learn from them.
People who are happy with themselves don’t need power over others to feel good about themselves.

They also live by the motto that, “No one has power over you unless you give it to them!”

Wrapping up Procrastination

5. You May Be Perfect, but… Let It Go

It’s also okay to give yourself permission to do the best job you can rather than always striving for perfection in everything you do at work. Sometimes this perfectionism can lead to procrastination as we put so much stress on ourselves that we can just give up on the job completely or leave it until another day.
It’s okay to be human, make some mistakes and complete a task that is very good, even if it’s just shy of being perfect. You may surprise yourself when you let go of the idea of being perfect and find that your work and your productivity is pretty darned good.

6. Put Down the stick

Stop beating yourself up about making mistakes or your procrastination habit and don’t let others do it either. The last thing you need when trying to get over a difficult habit or pattern is negativity, from internal or external sources.
Learn a little tenderness with yourself as you are growing out of both your perfectionism and procrastination. Reward yourself (but not too much) when you move forward and re-commit yourself (a lot) when you start to fall back. If you are patient enough with yourself you will get where you want to go.

7. Change Your Thinking and Change Your mind

Most of our procrastination is about our thinking. We put up mental blocks that get in the way of getting things done. Sometimes our thinking gets us so worked up that we start avoiding tasks that just have to get completed.
The secret to avoiding procrastination is to change our mindset and reset our brains so that we can actually accomplish what we set out to do. Change your mind and your thinking and your body will follow.

More on Procratination

2. Set Priorities and Stick With Them

Next start your day off with a “to do” list that prioritizes your most important tasks. As your day progresses you watch for some tell-tale signs of procrastination.
These might include leaving an important item on your list until the last minutes of the day when you run out of time to complete it or starting in on a job and then getting up for a cup of coffee or checking your e-mails before you get it done.
If you are going to avoid making procrastination a habit you need to stay focused on the job at hand and not give in to the many distractions that can take you in another direction.

3. Deal With Your Time Management Problem

If you are still struggling after you admit you have a problem and just can’t get your priorities completed you may have a time management problem. You may still be a procrastinator too but get yourself a good time management book and start following some of the techniques they suggest.
You may never be perfect at time management but you will be better and that will certainly help you deal with your procrastination.

4. Eat the Elephant in Small Bites

Another good suggestion is to take large or particularly difficult tasks and break them down into smaller and more manageable pieces. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
This will get you moving and as you complete the smaller pieces you will feel good that you are accomplishing something and eventually you can cross that job off your list. It’s very important to focus on starting the work rather than finishing it.
Thinking about all of the work involved in completing an onerous task can get you down and discouraged. Instead of thinking about the finish line, just get up and running in the race.

Procrastination

1. Admit You Have a Problem

The first step to avoiding procrastination is like many other situations: admit that you have a problem. Take a look at your work habits and determine why you are putting off doing some particular tasks.
You might find that you are not deliberately avoiding this work; you just can’t seem to find the time to get it done. If that’s the case then you don’t have a procrastination problem you actually have a time management problem. That’s good news because it’s easy to fix by setting priorities and sticking with them.

2. Set Priorities and Stick With Them

Next start your day off with a “to do” list that prioritizes your most important tasks. As your day progresses you watch for some tell-tale signs of procrastination.
These might include leaving an important item on your list until the last minutes of the day when you run out of time to complete it or starting in on a job and then getting up for a cup of coffee or checking your e-mails before you get it done.
If you are going to avoid making procrastination a habit you need to stay focused on the job at hand and not give in to the many distractions that can take you in another direction.