LIFE

Below if from a very good friend and neighbor and her morning...

This morning has given me pause for what really matters in life- LIFE.
I was getting on the approach ramp to 95N this morning and the cross over vehicle in front of me on the ramp hit the corner of the guard rail and flipped in the air several times, hit the guard rail again and then spun around and landed only feet in front of me.  It was like watching a movie in slow motion.  I couldn't move over, couldn't back up but only pray that I would not get hit.  When the car stopped I pulled up around it and parked my car on the highway to run to help whoever was in this vehicle.  It didn't matter who it was only that someone's life was at risk.   It was a young girl, alone, trapped in the car. I quickly yelled to a passerby to call 911 while through the windshield glass I tried my best to keep this poor young girl calm not knowing what injuries she might have.  A young woman who had been behind me also pulled over for support.  A young fireman off duty happened to come up on the scene and also called for help. The young fireman was able to get the back hatch open and the young woman was able to get out.  I was able to get the woman around the vehicle where we waited for what seemed like an eternity for the police to arrive and then the rescue.  Her injuries were not severe by a miracle of God.  For me this incident was a blessing.
 A reminder of what truly matters.  It's not what you have or don't have, but Life itself.
Hug someone today, Do something nice for someone.

Talk

Talk is cheap...

It is not what people say , it what they do that matters.
Any carnival barker can sell their product but when you get it Home is the miracle cure just colored water and sugar?

If you want to see if you can trust a person just look ... does he or she follow through on what they say ?
How do they treat people around them and how do they react with people that may disagree with them?

Actions speak louder than words.

Does the person talk in circles?
Do they not answer a question directly ?
Do they seem to talk down to others?
These all speak to the character of the person.

Character Counts.

I will take a person who speaks plainly and has a stand up character every day over the person who holds a title and hides behind his closed door in his or her fancy office , who says whatever they want to please the person in front of them.

Titles mean nothing... how did that person work his or her way up the ladder?

Watch... listen and judge for yourself... do not hitch your wagon to a false or selfish so called leader.

Dedication

There is an excerpt from Bill Belichick’s book, “The Education  a Coach “ where he speaks about his father Steve Belichick and what made him successful that rings through for those in business too:

“ Years later Bill Belichick would understand what made his father so good a scout: 

The absolute dedication to his craft, the belief that it was important, and the fact that so many people- the people who paid his salary, his colleagues, and the young men who played for him- were depending on him.”

People depending on him -

People who paid HIS salary -

Those are the values that great men like Paul Arpin had and it drove them to be better and to do better - ultimately they felt the responsibility to OTHERS- to the people around them and whose checks he signed.

He did not see just employees , he saw their families.

If you want to succeed and touch others then you need to get to the point in your life when you realize it is not all about you, then you can start the road of “ true success “.

Why do you what you do ? Why dedicate your time for something?

People depend on you, your family, your spouse, and the people around you depend on you doing your best , when you dedicate yourself to your craft you are able to put blinders on to all the noise around you and remember why you are doing it and who you are doing it for.

Fitting in

We are all unique.

We are all unique yet we worry about “ fitting in “ .

Wanting to fit in is probably something that we are struggle with from childhood, as usual most of our baggage comes from the “ growing up “ years. Did our father not spend time with you or was your mother not there ? - were you always trying to get his or her attention, wanting to fit in or was it your neighborhood friends or the dreaded kids in elementary or middle school ?

Growing up can be difficult and when we enter the full time works force we find the same crap, the clicks and the “ cool” kids ( now just older and bigger ) and we find ourselves again trying to fit in.

It is too bad because we exert much to much energy and lose far too much time caring about what other people think or keeping quiet even when we see or hear wrong being done because we do not want to make waves because making waves might mean you will not fit in.
The heck with it and the heck with them- speak out and stand up.

Most times when you work your way in you realize you do not like the people around you and worse, you begin to give up and lose a bit of yourself every day.
Care less about fitting in and care more about enjoying your life and just being YOU.
Always be polite and give people the benefit of the doubt because remember, we all have baggage.

If “ fitting in” means turning a deaf eye or a blind eye to misjustice it is never worth it.

Urgency

You should approach your job with a sense of urgency with ownership of the situation.

Every day I see a lack of a sense of urgency from people in the work place, they do just enough and then pass it on.
Wrong !
Always stay in the circle and stay on it until there is a solution, follow up and follow through. The most used quote from people that just don’t get it is - “ it’s not my job “.

By staying in the circle you learn more, by asking if you can help, you learn more. If you are responsible for something then take control, remember your word is your bond. If the ball is dropped somewhere down the line by someone else it is still a reflection on you. It is less stressful to stay in it then to just pass it on and hope.
Follow up and follow through.

If most people took all that negative energy and time spent complaining about the process and other people and spent that energy helping the process and others they would feel better at the end of the day and they would learn more of the process and maybe even help streamline it.

Take ownership and have a sense of urgency.

Criticize and compliment

Compliment in public

Criticize in private 

This should be a basic rule in life, especially in business.

You should never criticize anyone in public, you have absolutely nothing to gain and everything to lose. If you want to speak to someone about a mistake or disagree with how they handled a situation then do so in private. First be sure to hear them out and allow them to tell you their side , you may even be best served to not even address it at that time, allow their explanation to seek in and maybe get other perspective. If you do need to criticize use it as a teaching moment, what would have been the better way for them to handle it ? 

I know of bosses that fly out of their office and totally berate an employee in the middle of the room, OMG - how disrespectful and what did he gain ? Not only is the person he is berating embarrassed and angry the other people in the room are embarrassed and know that if he can do to that person he will do it to them... very counterproductive and terrible for moral.

Places to Go

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Kahoots with someone. I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there. I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my children, friends, family and my retired military family. I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore. I have also been in Doubt. It is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often. I've been in Flexible, but it was very important to stand up right and firm Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older. One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense!   This place really gets the adrenaline flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get! I may have been in Continent, but I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing. They tell me it is very wet and damp there. My job is done!   Life is too short for negative drama and petty things.  So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!

Football

First I am not a New England Patriot fan but there are a lot of business lessons within that organization.

I was a Patriot fan back before Brady but I felt loyal to Bill Parcells , their coach before Bill Belichick and their Quarterback before  Tom Brady , Drew Bledsoe. The front office decided to move away from Parcells and Bledsoe even though before then they were a very weak organization. I felt loyal to them but in retrospect the front office of course knew what they were doing so my first lesson was you can not judge why decisions are made unless you are totally privy to the reasons why.

Some of the lessons learned by this now dynasty of the New England Patriots are:
TEAM
Focus
And Leadership

The Patriots have been able to sustain their winning ways for 18 years because they have a great leader in Belichick that tells his team to “trust the system” and just worry about doing “ your job”.

In order to have buy in Belichick and his coaches need to do their homework and give their team the tools they need to know to succeed , they study their opponents and break down a game plan and most important they are ready to readjust and by doing so the players know that if they pay attention and do their job they will be in the best position to win.

The same must be applied to business, for a business to succeed it must have good leaders that give give their employees the tools they need to succeed and they must be ready to adjust with the times.

Everyone needs to stay focused and work together-
TEAM
FOCUS
LEADERSHIP

The Short Game

The biggest difference from today’s work world and the work world of the 70’s and 80’s when I first entered the work force is chain stores, conglomerates and “ big business “.

As the small guy continued to get pushed out and the small businesses became a thing of the past the game changed.

It is all about the short game now.

Back then the owners, managers and those “ in charge “ were playing the long game, they were building a business that they wanted to not only retire in but they also wanted those that worked there to stay and retire there too. 

Back then they invested in their employees and cared for them because that was not only the right and moral thing to do it was how they were able to sustain the business.

Today most work for a chain store or a conglomerate of board members that are charged to raise the stock levels so they can resell , they are investing in the money and turnover not the people.

In the short game the person is not relevant, you are replaceable, a chess piece for the people that are running the business to achieve their “ number”. 

Most likely the people that are your bosses are not in control themselves, they too are chess pieces for the “money “ at the top.

You can not stop progress , I am sure the work world I grew up in the 70’s and 80’s was quite different from my fathers in the 40’s and 50’s but I do think mine was the last generation for many things. 

-Working and dedicating yourself to a job that you could retire in and having the owner that knew “you “ is the biggest change.

-Being able to “shut down” is another huge change, with technology came the computer and the cell phone and an umbilical cord to our jobs that has us in constant work mode to the very people that now will have little or no loyalty to us because we are all so expendable and are their chess pieces in their short game.

Through it all our best hope is that we remember what is truly important and who and what you want to show your loyalty to. 

Work hard and do your best but find the time to “shut down” and find peace and happiness in your family and the simple pleasures of things around you.

That is “your” long game.

Own it

Take responsibility... own it.
What separates a elite employee or worker from the rest ?
They own it... they do not think of excuses, they think of solutions.
There will always be situations that arise because someone messed up and will now effect what you need to do... just do it. You will have time to address the process later but in the moment do not blame other people just take it on and for goodness sake do not let others know that others messsed up and you are now the hero, that is not being a team player and remember one day you may be the person who messes up.
The customer does not care WHO messed up they just want it right.
Be polite, access the situation and if you do not have the immediate answer do not pass them or bull shit, get back to them with the answer... own it.

Body Language

What does your body language say to your co workers ?

I was in work Meeting with about 12 -14 People and everyone was engaged, sitting up and looking like they wanted to participate, except for one in particular. He was slouched back looking at his phone the entire time, even when he did speak his eyes never left his phone... are you kidding me ?

Come on people, be aware of how others look at you and goodness sake respect them.

When you cannot even sit up and look people in the eye you might as well not participate because you are doing no one any favors and most of all yourself.

You are telling everyone that you do not respect them, you might as well get up and slap them all in the face because that is how it is perceived and that feeling will leave the room with them.

Why?

I do not care how many years you have been at your job or what the subject matter may be or who is speaking... it is just plain rude. And do you really think that whatever is said you can not learn or help?

Always be aware of your body language, rather you are in a meeting or just sitting across from someone- what are you telling them ? What are your facial expressions? Why put up a wall ?

No matter what we do we can always learn and no matter what we do we need others.

Do not show your arrogance... be aware... who knows you may actually learn something or at least look at something differently which may allow you to think differently when you leave the room.

Lincoln

I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, and stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong. 
Abraham Lincoln

You must stand for something or you will fall for anything.
I believe that deep down people know right from wrong , unfortunately many get caught in a trap and mostly by the financial trap and people end up turning a deaf ear to their inner voice because of it.

Here’s the thing, it will always catch up to so always listen to that voice and choose the right and moral path... always.

Forgiveness

The more I know, the less I understand,

All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down
To the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness

Ah, these times are so uncertain

There's a yearning undefined
And People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age?
Ah, the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Ohh, pride and competition
Cannot fill these empty arms

There are people in your life
Who've come and gone
They let you down
You know they hurt your pride
You better put it all behind you baby
'Cause life goes on
You keep carryin' that anger
It'll eat you up inside baby

Forgiveness 

Assume

Do not Assume ...

Do not assume when you are training in the work place, always explain your thoughts and give the “why” and explain what happens outside of that particular department.
What and who will be effected by their process and what difference can “they” make ?
And always try to remind the people around you about your customer because that is the reason they have a job in the first place.

In my particular job we move household goods and for the company I work for now we deal solely with moving military members all around the country. Every decision each individual makes will effect a person, a family, children and our soldiers and people need to be reminded of that, do not assume they know.
If they “drop the ball “ what happens? If the driver and a truck is not there to pick up the household goods at a house on a planned day or deliver on a planned day what happens? How is that family put out? What does that mother or father have to do with their children or how does it effect their work ?
Same goes for information that is not followed up on, access to a residence or the estimated size of a move or any additional items needed to do the job properly, it all matters.

Everything everyone does in a registered move can effect that move and normally many hands touch a move so everyone should know the process.
How does a move begin and travel through the system and how many people touch a move from the first notation and confirmation to the first contact with the member moving to the first person to ring the doorbell to load and delivery... a lot goes into one move.

But everyone should never lose sight of the person, the customer, the family, yes we are talking about moving furniture but it is more than that, we are moving and effecting people’s lives and they will be effected by what each and every person does or does not do.
Do you know if that military member is being deployed overseas and is he or she leaving their family behind leaving their spouse to coordinate the move and schools and all that goes with it ?

Do not assume people in your workplace understand the “ bigger” picture, it is up to all of us to teach and respect each other’s role in the process and to respect the people we have that job for in the first place.

Do not assume... teach and respect and always continue to learn.

George Carlin

George Carlin's wife died early in 2008 and George followed her, dying in July 2008. It is ironic George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent and so very appropriate. An observation by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete.

Remember to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

And always remember, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by those moments that take our breath away.

Speak out

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

The big three

Yesterday’s blog I talked about the big three-

Respect

Honesty and

Getting paid promptly and correct 

I stated that if your workplace provides all three of these then you should work hard to do your best and make a home.  Never stop learning and be your own worse critic and never rest on your past.

Now, if you do not receive ANY one of the big three... get out.

You should never work for someone who does not respect you, how can you respect yourself if you do?

If they are dishonest- run- if they lie once they will lie again, rather to you or anyone.

And if they do not pay you what is owed you and when they owe you then it is time to go.

If you need to find a home then do it on your terms and never ever burn a bridge.

Do not stay and complain and whine and try to get others to complain and whine, just do what YOU need to do.
Shake hands, look them in the eyes and thank them... take with you what you have learned, good and bad and use that to do better in your next job... always smile.

You cannot demand respect it must be earned and respect cuts both ways.

Feeling used ?

Feeling Used ?

It is because you are ...

A lot of people feel like they are being used in their job and “ the man” just cares about himself...

Yup- you are correct, that is how it works. I hate to tell you but you were not hired just for your looks.

The question is not “ are you being used” the question is are you doing what YOU want to do.

When a driver was looking to make a jump from OR to my company I would always ask -

With your current employer “ Are you respected? “ “ Are they honest with you ?“ and “ do you get paid promptly and correctly?”.- if the answer is yes for all three then you should think before jumping.

As long as you can check off those boxes the only other question is are you doing what you want to do.

Everyone needs to make money, including your employer so ,yes, they are using you- to make them money !

 If you make them a lot of money they move you up the ladder and they love you, if you lose them money you slide down that same ladder till they need to make the decision on rather or not you are worth keeping. 

That is reality.

In the end personalities do not matter, I have had owners tell me that they totally dis like a person working for them and higher up employees..VP’s.. but they keep them because they make them money. They told me that the day they do not make them money they will cut them loose in New York minute.

That is business.

I know others may offer you more money or bonuses etc but remember they to want to “use” you too,
 if you are good at what you do it will all come out in the wash. Go back to the big three questions- respect, honesty and paid promptly and correct.
I always approached it like I knew I was good at what I do and through that I knew my employer made money from me, -that was what I wanted.
 I wanted to make him lots of money because I knew he would then take care of me, it was in his benefit to do so.

Do not concentrate so much on what “ they” are making and spend more time on improving what “you” do. 

Life change

If you want to be healthier then make life changes.

I never liked diets because my thought was if I can not commit to it for life then why bother. 

In my 40’s I got sloppy and did not excericse and I ate crappy , my weight got up to over 215 lbs with, my Waste line pushing 40 and being 5’7” that was not a good thing. My cholesterol shot up and my doctor wanted to put be on pills and I hate pills.
I needed to lose weight so I joined a gym and started daily exercises and I cut out sugars and ate more fruit and vegetables and ate smaller portions over all and wanted to do something I could commit to for life. Over 10 years later I am still on that same path and found my happy weight of 180 and a 34 waist and lower blood pressure and cholesterol, and no pills.

For a healthier life you never ever reach your goal because you are always watching what you eat and drink and you need to stay in the exercise mode. It is not fair because it is so much easier to stay on your couch and eat that crap but in the end you will feel better and hopefully have a better quality of life, and that is worth the change.

Here’s the thing, do not celebrate or brag about your loss of weight because remember you never really reach the finish line so stay focused, develop good habits.

That is all it is.. habits... it’s your life.. stop making excuses.

Delegate

Learn to Delagate ...
My first manager, back in the late 70’s, was a great guy and worked very hard but his biggest issue as a manager is he never delagated properly. He would just do everything himself, I had to take stuff from him or he would literally do it all and that would not have been healthy for him, me or the business.
It is imperative that the boss or manager know the process and also set the example but he also needs to know how to train and delegate - and most important follow up and inspect what you expect.
A healthy business always has employees that can multi task and that can do the work of the guy they sit next to or works close with. Their roles should be interchangeable and it is up to the manager or boss to create that environment.
Set the example but delegate... and follow up.
You should always be in training mode.

Excuses

Stop making excuses... 

It starts and ends with YOU, you can point the finger and blame others but ultimately it is up to you to succeed and it is up to YOU to be happy. 

Yes, we may need assistance from others but that is why it is imperative that we know how the machine works, and then work the machine, work within and around.

There may be times that you need to pick up the ball or to confirm important information that may impede your progress, do not completely rely on others. 

The more self efficient you can be the more successful you will be.

Do not make excuses- learn - learn what went wrong and learn to work around it next time.

Failure is just an opportunity to learn.

Take control- take responsibility- learn how the machine works.

Following Through

Anyone can promise anything or make any resolution that they want...
It’s the following though and the follow up that matters.

Did you give someone your word on something? Or did you promise yourself something?
Talk is cheap and so are promises.
You need to follow it up, if it includes other parties doing their job then you are still NOT off the hook... follow up. Make those calls and drop those emails.
You are only as good as your word.

If someone else dropped the ball in the chain that effected what you promised- guess what?...
It is still on YOU.

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY - OWN IT.

If you made a resolution or promise to yourself then whatever it is- make it a habit.
To form a habit you need to do it for 30 straight days - did you promise to lose weight? Eat healthy?
Be more attentive to your loved ones? Exercise more? Return every work email promptly ?
All very good resolutions but only if you follow up and follow through.
You can do it but you need to WANT to do it.

We only have one life.... don’t waste it wishing ... take charge.

Disney

Happy New Year !

Having spent a week in Disney World with my family I experienced once again customer service at its best. Besides the amazing rides and events in Disney the customer service is simply amazing and ALWAYS consistent!
From the person picking up the trash to the people working in the parks and hotels EVERYONE is trained to help and they all are very helpful and SMILE.

For me it is always a lesson in how all businesses should be run, if Disney can still produce this kind of customer service on their level then YOU can certainly provide it on your level.

It starts with the training.

Disney shares their philosophy and wants every employee to know as much about the company and the their fellow cast members as they possibly can. They TRAIN to always stop what they are doing if someone approaches them with a question and be as helpful as possible, smile and say good day and thank you. - sound simple ? - it is ! - Do you do it ?

Here is an example, on my last day I was in line for the concierge to ask a few questions and they were busy so a receptionist near by saw me waiting and called me over to see if they could help. It was not her “job” but she went out of her way to help- imagine that .
And here’s the really cool thing, I went back to that same lady about 45 minutes later with another question and she immediately said is there something else I can for you Mr. Vieira ? She even remembered my name. All the people she spoke to and still remembered my name.
That my friends is the secret - always go the next step- do not avoid the work, run to it.
It is that extra step that people remember - smile and try to help- it is that easy.

Learn as much as you can about how things work around you so you can be ready to help, don’t rejoice in passing the buck or the call, embrace having the answers and helping.

Make it one of your resolutions!