Make Believe

I can exist in a broken environment
I cannot exist in a make believe environment

What I mean by that is I can learn to live with people I do not agree with either in my personal life or in my work world but that said I need to also be able to express my opinions and with that be able to do what I do without fear of repercussions toward me or others.

Growing up my father was an alcoholic and I said it out loud once and was scolded by my mother, I knew he had issues and by not at least saying it out loud it would never have any opportunity to change or at least discuss it.
At the work place I had a boss that was very abusive to others, not so much me but everyone around him and me and by not saying anything to those in power I felt complete complicit.

If we can’t voice out loud what we see and disagree with we are forced to live in a make believe world and that I cannot do , when we hide our head and live in silence we begin to die inside and we will never truly exhale.

I do not like confrontation and I coil at environments that create yelling and anger and much of that I attribute to growing up in that house with a verbally abusive alcoholic, by everyone staying silent he never had a chance to address his issues and the family never had a chance to address their issues and years later both my sisters became alcoholics themselves.
I watched both my father and one of my sisters die piece by piece because of that disease and presently watch my other sister still struggle with wet brain and drinking.

I do not like confrontation but I do speak out and voice my opinion and if I can conduct change I stick it out and try to do so , more for those around me then even for myself.
If I feel as if I cannot conduct change I leave that situation so not to live in that make believe world.

Change is difficult
Honesty is difficult
But if it comes from the right place - change and honesty is absolutely necessary!