Lessons from the Pope

1. Be Accessible

Pope Francis is arguably best known for availability and openness to the public. On his first day as Pope, he reversed the tradition of blessing the people by inviting them to bless him instead. He's since decided to ride in a bus with his team rather than in a bulletproof limousine. Pope Francis has also been seen getting around Rome in a Ford Focus and a Fiat during his U.S. visit.

Personal, handwritten thank-you notes and birthday lunch invitations to the homeless of Rome take priority in his schedule and exemplify his leadership vision.

Those who aren't spiritual leaders should also rethink what their most important responsibilities are—people over processes, names over numbers. Accessibility sows trust and loyalty among colleagues and customers, making other transformations possible.

Listen

If you Listen to the customer they will always give you the path to a successful move.

Yes- the customer is ultimately always right and you will never win in the end if you oppose them or try to give them all your years of wisdom in the moving business in five minutes.

I understand that you are the boss and the crew chief and you know what needs to be done BUT remember who is paying.
Listen.

Also when you first walk the house with the customer ask questions of course but more important this is where they will really tell you what is of most importance to THEM.
It may not necessarily be the most expensive items in the house either, it may some piece that has a lot of sentimental memories to it for them.
Listen.

In any case when they seem concerned you need to express YOUR concern. Yes, you may know that you have it under control and it may not be a big deal to you but you need to remember that this is THEIR move and they need to know that you care about what concerns them.
Listen.

Find out what is most important to them and mother it , and try to do it in front of them .
Show them you care.

Sometimes it's not easy

Sometimes it's not easy
It's easy to give up
You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough
Don't let that stop you, stop it and its traps
Keep moving forward, you don't have to look back

Break down the doors
Break through the walls
You already have it all

Own every breath
Own every minute
Who lives a life that's got no limits
Only one thing you need to know
Just never think, just never think you've won, and you will, and you will, and you will, you will

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/jennifer-hudson-you-will-lyrics.html

Sometimes it's not easy
It's easy to give up
You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough
Don't let that stop you, stop it and its traps
Keep moving forward, you don't have to look back

Break down the doors
Break through the walls
You already have it all

Own every breath
Own every minute
Who lives a life that's got no limits
Only one thing you need to know
Just never think, just never think you've won, and you will, and you will, and you will, you will

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/jennifer-hudson-you-will-lyrics.htmlSometimes it's not easy

It's easy to give up

You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough

Don't let that stop you

Keep Moving forward, you don't have to look back

Take hold of your life

OWN IT

Stay positive and Keep Moving Forward


Sometimes it's not easy
It's easy to give up
You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough
Don't let that stop you, stop it and its traps
Keep moving forward, you don't have to look back

Break down the doors
Break through the walls
You already have it all

Own every breath
Own every minute
Who lives a life that's got no limits
Only one thing you need to know
Just never think, just never think you've won, and you will, and you will, and you will, you will

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/jennifer-hudson-you-will-lyrics.html

Sometimes it's not easy
It's easy to give up
You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough
Don't let that stop you, stop it and its traps
Keep moving forward, you don't have to look back

Break down the doors
Break through the walls
You already have it all

Own every breath
Own every minute
Who lives a life that's got no limits
Only one thing you need to know
Just never think, just never think you've won, and you will, and you will, and you will, you will

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/jennifer-hudson-you-will-lyrics.html

Jennifer Hudson "You Will" lyrics

Sometimes it's not easy
It's easy to give up
You do your best, seems like your best isn't good enough
Don't let that stop you, stop it and its traps
Keep moving forward, you don't have to look back

Break down the doors
Break through the walls
You already have it all

Own every breath
Own every minute
Who lives a life that's got no limits
Only one thing you need to know
Just never think, just never think you've won, and you will, and you will, and you will, you will

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/jennifer-hudson-you-will-lyrics.html

More on forgiveness..

5. Don’t forgive just to avoid pain – It can be easy to quickly grant forgiveness in order to avoid conflict and pain in the relationship. This usually is an attempt at conflict avoidance rather than true forgiveness. Take the appropriate amount of time to think through the situation and what will be involved in repairing the relationship before you grant forgiveness.

6. Don’t use forgiveness as a weapon – If you truly forgive someone, you won’t use their past behavior as a tool to harm them whenever you feel the need to get a little revenge.

7. Forgiveness isn’t dependent on the other person showing remorse – Whether or not the person who violated your trust apologizes or shows remorse for their behavior, the decision to forgive rests solely with you. Withholding forgiveness doesn’t hurt the other person, it only hurts you, and it’s not going to change anything that happened in the past. Forgiveness is up to you.

8. Forgiveness is freedom – Holding on to pain and bitterness drains your energy and negatively colors your outlook on life. Granting forgiveness allows you to let go of the negative emotions that hold you back and gives you the ability to move forward with freedom and optimism.

Forgiveness is the first step in rebuilding a relationship with someone who has betrayed your trust. If you skip this step you take the risk of trying to rebuild your relationship on shifting sand and eventually trust will crumble again.

 Start with forgiveness, you won’t regret it.

Forgiveness

As you consider forgiving someone who has betrayed your trust, here are 8 principles to remember:

1. Forgiveness is a choice – It’s not a feeling or an attitude. Forgiving someone is a mental decision, a choice, that you have complete control over. You don’t have to wait until you “feel” like forgiving someone.

2. Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting – You don’t have to forget the betrayal in order to forgive. You may never forget what happened, and those memories will creep in occasionally, but you can choose to forgive and move on.

3. Forgiveness doesn’t eliminate consequences – Some people are reticent to give forgiveness because somehow they think it lets the other person off-the-hook from what they did wrong. Not true. Consequences should still be enforced even if you grant forgiveness.

4. Forgiving doesn’t make you a weakling or a doormat – Forgiveness shows maturity and depth of character. If you allow repeated violations of your trust then you’re a doormat. But forgiving others while adhering to healthy boundaries is a sign of strength, not weakness.

The rest tomorrow..

Make a Match

Matching is required —

 In dominoes the primary objective is to lay down a domino that matches the number of previously played bones. The same is true for successful leadership practices—you need to match the needs of your team .

The Team needs to show up in a number of areas: development level on specific goals or tasks, emotional needs, communication styles, learning styles, etc.

The goal for the leader is to match the needs of team members by using the right leadership style or practices.

When developing people’s skills on goals or tasks, the leader has to use the right blend of directive and supportive behaviors that allow team members to develop their competence and commitment.

When communicating, the leader needs to transmit the message in a way team members will understand, internalize, and encourage dedication to the team and its mission.

If the employee needs emotional support, then the leader needs to find the right expressions of empathy or encouragement to get the person back on track. Whatever the need, the goal is for the leader to match.

Principles

“Keep living the principles and values even if no one else goes along with them or acknowledges your good work.

We are trying to live this way, not because it will make us popular or successful or get others to go along with us.

We are trying to live this way because it is the way we think our business and life ought to be lived.”

 

Trickle Down

If you are the person in charge, the boss, the crew chief..

Poor professionalism at the top; management handles situations badly, which trickles down and infects the organization or the crew.

  Cynicism and infighting; toxic behavior patterns Gossip cliques and backchannel complaining Issues with procrastination, slowing of work speed Resentment and irritation if gestures of recognition are off-base or too little, too late -

Create a culture of recognition -

Everyone wants to be respected and appreciated, and we often have different underlying desires that keep us going through a tough project.
When a team is slogging through tight deadlines or feels overworked or unseen, recognition can boost morale and strengthen their sense of team identity and support from management.
 Make appreciative communication patterns a habit among the team, and avoid superficial assumptions of what really matters and motivates. -

A Strong Team

Characteristics of strong teams   

• A common purpose and goal (of personal resonance for each member)
• Communicate openly and effectively
• Foster mutual trust in the team and among individual members
• Manage conflicts transparently and strive to support good morale
• Clarify roles and styles of leadership
• Value diversity of experience and viewpoints
• Apply effective decision-making processes
• Cultivate a positive, supportive environment

My Share

I had my share of failures

but I also had my fair share of successes.

The idea is to not let your failures define you, understand that to learn and grow you have to try first and know that even if you have the best intentions there will be times that you will fail.

As long as you know that you did not maliciously try to hurt someone and the your intentions were honest then let it go... you cannot win them all.

Below are some quotes from Thomas Edison- the greatest inventor of all time..

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Genius is one percent inspiration, ninety-nine percent perspiration.

If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.

Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits.

Hell, there are no rules here - we're trying to accomplish something.

Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.

Happiness

Want to be happy?

Want to be happy?.. Try these suggestions-

-Turn mistakes into Lessons
-Go Off Line more
-Give yourself a break
-Build relationships
-Don't blame the Past
-Take Chances
-Be Honest
-Don't Compare Yourself to Others

Stay out of my Way

It isn't fair..

It just irritates me when I drive on the highway and I am in the high speed lane and because one person 6 cars in front of me decides to go 50 MPH he holds everybody behind him up.
 There are people to my right so I am stuck in this line because one person is too selfish to move over or too oblivious or both.

I relate it to a lot of life in general, so much of our day depends on others, if one is too lazy or oblivious to things around them it can effect what you and I do.

If you do not want to run the speed limit- at least get out of the way.
If you do not want to do your job then the same applies..-get out of the way.

General Pattern once said- "Lead me. Follow me or get out of my way".

The Muck

It’s easy to get lost in the muck as the day goes on..

Seemingly simple tasks can take you down a rabbit hole if you aren't clear on the order of the day. Really successful people establish a clear picture of what needs their attention.

 Each morning, they determine what is critical for them to handle and what can be successfully delegated to others. Make a list of those critical items that you must do now, and find ways to move everything else aside.

Not every event is as it seems.

Sometimes the most frustrating failure can actually be the beginning of the greatest success--but only if you recognize the difference. Really successful people make very few assumptions about events.

 They consider each occurrence on its own merit and then determine the many branches of possibility. Each morning, they review the days leading up and game out the various probabilities ahead.

Spend a little time getting out of your patterns to consider what happens if you think a different way.

Body Language

Studies have shown that 70% or more of communication is nonverbal.

 Our body language often conveys much more meaning than our words so it’s important than your body language is in alignment with the intent of your words. If at all possible, eliminate physical barriers, like a desk, between you and the person you’re speaking with. Sit side by side or in front of each other, don’t cross your arms, roll your eyes, or grimace.

 Be sure to smile, nod in understanding, and verbally respond with phrases like “I hear you” or “I understand” to show the other person you’re tracking with the conversation.

Be Geniune and rememer to Listen

People can see right through a phony.

 If you don’t genuinely care for the other person in the relationship it will show in your words and actions. If it’s important for you to build trust with someone, then you should find ways to genuinely care about them.

Examine the relationship to see what it is about the person, or the role they play in your organization, that you appreciate and value. Focus on those aspects of the relationship in an authentic and genuine way.


Most of us have poor listening skills.

Instead of listening to someone to understand their point of view, we spend our mental energy formulating a response. Practice active listening techniques such as asking open-ended questions/statements like “Tell me more” or “How did that make you feel?” Paraphrase key points and check for understanding throughout the conversation and listen with the intent to be influenced by the person speaking, not with the intent to argue or debate.

 Listening can be one of the easiest and quickest ways to establish trust with someone.

How you treat others and communication

Right or wrong, people will judge the quality of your character by how you speak about and treat others.

If you are positive and respectful in your words and actions, people will trust that you will treat them the same way. The opposite is also true.

If you speak disparagingly about others or treat others as “less than” yourself, people will not trust you will act with fairness and integrity in your dealings with them

Just as the secret in real estate is “location, location, location,” the secret to trust-building communication is “timing, timing, timing.” In addition to finding the right time to communicate, it’s important to choose the proper place and method. If your communication involves sensitive personal information, have a face-to-face conversation in a private location.

Use email, phone, and other methods of communication that are appropriate to the specific situation.

Your words can be used to build other people up or tear them down. Which do you think will build trust? Building them up, of course. Look for every opportunity to use your communication to help others learn, grow, and become the best version of themselves possible.

 Doing so will cause people to see that you have their best interests in mind, a key driver of deciding to place their trust in you.

 Say what you mean, mean what you say, be forthright, honest, compassionate, caring, and responsible with your communication. If you say something that harms another, apologize sincerely and make amends. It’s really that simple.

From the owner of Affilated Movers of Oklahoma

Nathan Howell has left a new comment on your post "I want what he has..":

Always a good scripture for every occasion:

“But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your heart, don’t cover up the truth with boasting and lying. For jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic. For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.”
James 3:14-16 NLT
http://bible.com/116/jas.3.14-16.nlt

National Driver Appreciation Week

Next week, September 13-19, is National Truck Driver Appreciation Week and here at Arpin we are proud to have some of the best drivers in the household goods industry. We all appreciate your hard work and efforts every day and we want to take this time to say thank you.

 

Thank you to all of the drivers that have ever driven for Arpin, as well as the drivers that have joined our family in recent years.

Below is a short thank you video to some of the veteran drivers that help build our foundation and that are still driving for Arpin!

https://youtu.be/naHotTJHOps

 

Thank you to all of our drivers and know that you are all very much appreciated.

 

Drive safe and Happy National Truck Driver Appreciation Week!

 

From all of us at Arpin !

More on Shared Information

Road Warrior has left a new comment on your post "Shared information":

You forgot the one thing we use it for most....The getting reviews for , and good labor...This stuff on Facebook, started with a guy in Florida...Larry(I'll leave out his last name for privacy),worked with me and impressed me to the point that I invited him on to a Householddrivers group I created...Maybe 3 years ago..I asked him to get on there and advertise, we need more labor like him. I continued to invite others of good quality and he, in turn, started calling all these other guys and setting up a network of good help...That ballooned into 15 HH groups, every one of them helping drivers find labor..
YES, social media can be a good thing...

Body Language

Studies have shown that 70% or more of communication is nonverbal.

 Our body language often conveys much more meaning than our words so it’s important than your body language is in alignment with the intent of your words. If at all possible, eliminate physical barriers, like a desk, between you and the person you’re speaking with. Sit side by side or in front of each other, don’t cross your arms, roll your eyes, or grimace.

Be sure to smile, nod in understanding, and verbally respond with phrases like “I hear you” or “I understand” to show the other person you’re tracking with the conversation

Listen

Most of us have poor listening skills.

Instead of listening to someone to understand their point of view, we spend our mental energy formulating a response. Practice active listening techniques such as asking open-ended questions/statements like “Tell me more” or “How did that make you feel?” Paraphrase key points and check for understanding throughout the conversation and listen with the intent to be influenced by the person speaking, not with the intent to argue or debate.

Listening can be one of the easiest and quickest ways to establish trust with someone.

Be Genuine

 People can see right through a phony.

 If you don’t genuinely care for the other person in the relationship it will show in your words and actions. If it’s important for you to build trust with someone, then you should find ways to genuinely care about them.

 Examine the relationship to see what it is about the person, or the role they play in your organization, that you appreciate and value.

Focus on those aspects of the relationship in an authentic and genuine way.

Follow the 80/20 rule and learn to say NO

 Follow the 80/20 rule.

 The 80/20 Rule, also known as Pareto’s Principle, says that 80% of your results come from only 20% of your actions.
It’s a way to prioritize your time against your most important goals. Are you focusing in on the 20% of activities that produce 80% of the results?

Learn to say no. At times, requests from others may be important to them but conflict with our most important goals. Even if it is something we would like to do but simply don’t have the time for, it can be very difficult to say no.

While it’s great to be a team player, it’s also important to know when and how to be assertive and let the person know you can’t handle their request at the moment. Negotiate a deadline that helps them achieve their goals without sacrificing your own.

Establish prioritized goals

Establish prioritized goals.

Without goals, we trend to chase after whatever seems most urgent or is staring us in the face. We get distracted by shiny objects. Establish your priorities by setting yearly, monthly, weekly, and daily
goals.

 Rank each of these goals using the following:

Importance: (A=high, B=medium, C=low)
Urgency: (1=high, 2=medium, 3=low)
Always work on the most urgent and important goals and tasks (A1) first.

Moving

Having recently moved again myself I can attest to how very stressful the total process is.
I have been in the same house for 24 years and recently moved , I forgot just how aggravating the whole process is, which is funny considering I have been in the moving business for over 30 years.
And thank goodness for that because at least that process was lifted off my shoulders, I had some wonderful friends and professional moves to help me pack and load.

But BEFORE we ever even got to that process we had to purge my house of 24 years of STUFF., Find a realtor , list the house, find a house, watch interest rates, have open houses, take bids and offers and counter, fix little things, on and on.

Then you get to deal with banks and credit unions and credit companies and then last the dreaded lawyers. All while trying to coordinate with people with bad communication skills.

I have come to realize even more so that in todays work force there is a HUGE gap in communication , people just do not follow up and even answer calls or email. I found myself doing THEIR job.
And it was all over and from people making commissions off of me and people that have been doing this for decades- not newbees-.

If we want to see why we may be losing jobs overseas you need to just look around you- we have lost the art of CARING- we have lost the WORK ETHIC that our grand parents and great grandparents were so proud of.
I believe that if people truly cared they would care enough to follow up and have your best interest at heart.

Don't look for your leaders to provide this or your politicians... look within.

Do YOU care? Do you care enough to follow up and follow through?

Yes or No

On a daily basis, we are all faced with making yes or no decisions that lead to certain consequences. With today’s many distractions and demands, it is easy to react quickly without first thinking through the implications. Are you making conscious responses that align with your commitments and goals?

Are you thinking through the implications before you say yes or no? Below are a few questions to ask yourself prior to making a knee-jerk decision.

• Who will benefit from this decision?
• What am I not going to be able to do if I say yes or no?
• Will this decision help me accomplish my goals or will it take time away from my efforts in reaching my goals?
• How much time will I need to invest?

More on being Bullied from a posting in the US News..

3. Document your situation. Get in the habit of noting what happens with this person and when. Keep a detailed log regarding your interactions—what he says and does, as well as what you say and do. Documentation will be your biggest ally should things take a turn for the worse in the future. And, of course, remember to always act in a way that you can be proud of. Don't let the bully push your buttons and bait you into an emotional reaction.

4. Get superiors involved. Unfortunately, there may only be so much you can do on your own in this situation. Bullies can be stubborn and irrational. Often, when it's gotten to this point, there's no use trying to simply sit down and hash it out with the person. You need to call in the cavalry.
Again, be sure you have your documentation in order and that you've objectively looked at the situation. Then, take the issue to your Human Resources department for help. Describe what is happening in detail and explain how the situation is impacting your ability to do your work. It's important to stress that you want to find a productive, comfortable way of addressing the situation.
In most environments, HR is your best bet for action. If you choose to go to a trusted supervisor instead, he or she may not want to get involved. HR, however, is specifically designed to handle these kinds of complaints. That doesn't mean it will always be addressed as quickly or effectively as you'd like, but they typically have more experience and a greater interest in resolving the issue, as they understand the potential legal ramification if the situation escalates.

5. Move on. Bullying left unchecked can harm your mental, physical, and emotional health. If you've done your best to manage the situation and you've sought assistance from HR but still no improvements have occurred, it's time to consider moving on. No, you're not letting the bully "win." You're simply taking care of yourself. You won't prove a point or teach anyone a lesson by staying in a dangerous situation. Everyone deserves a safe, comfortable work environment. If your current employer is not able to provide that to you, take your skills elsewhere.

Bullying..

From a posting on US News- by Chrissy Sciuicque..


Sometimes, the workplace can feel a lot like high school: Full of cliques, gossip, and passive-aggressive behavior. Bullying has been a hot topic as of late and sadly, adults are not immune to it. Bullies certainly exist in the workplace, though they aren't quite as obvious as they were in grade school. They don't go around throwing people into trash cans and stealing lunch money. But their torment can be just as destructive.

Whether the bully is criticizing you, conveniently "forgetting" to include you in important conversations, stealing credit for your work, or talking badly about you to others, his goal is always the same: To tear your down (typically in an effort to build himself up).

(Please note: The male pronoun is used here for ease of reading. Bullies can, indeed, be female too.)
As much as your children would like to believe you have all the answers, should you find yourself bullied in the workplace, you may feel as lost as a third grader regarding what to do. Here are a few tried-and-true recommendations.

1. Evaluate the situation. First, look at the situation objectively. What's really happening here? Is this person nasty to everyone, or is it just you? Are you, possibly, giving this person too much power? Maybe this bully just has a bad attitude and it has nothing to do with you. Is there any chance you're being overly sensitive, taking his or her words or actions to heart when they should be simply ignored?
This isn't intended to place the blame on the victim, but remember that the workplace is a professional environment, which means it won't always feel warm and fuzzy. You don't have to be friends with everyone. There are bound to be some people you just don't get along with, and that's OK.
Bullies, on the other hand, engage in persistently aggressive and/or unreasonable behavior against a person. That means you're singled out and the person is being more than just annoying or rude. Various definitions of workplace bullying use the words systematic, hostile, threatening, abusive, humiliating, intimidating, and sabotage. In short, bullies are intentionally trying to harm you and your ability to do your work.
So take a step back and look at what's going on. If the person is simply unpleasant and difficult to work with, you're probably not the only one who sees it, and you're certainly not alone. Practice patience and don't let their bad attitude affect you. If your situation does indeed rise to the level of bullying, keep reading.

2. Stand up for yourself. Don't be an easy target. If you shrink away and allow the behavior to continue without consequence, there's nothing to stop your bully from continuing on. Remember that people treat you the way you teach them to treat you (as Oprah has said about a thousand times). You give people instructions regarding what's acceptable behavior and what's not.

More tomorrow..