Are you a Boss or a Leader ?

Clint Eastwood

Some times people suffer from what I call ' The Clint Eastwood " syndrome.

That is where a person thinks they are bigger and tougher and more important then they really are.
I see a lot in the local guy on security duty at a sporting event or a concert. They think in order to do their job they have to look and act like Clint.
Or I see it in managers or bosses or even VP's- at the end of the day titles do mean anything. You can get more done and gain more respect if you simply look up and talk to people respectfully- no matter what your title or position.

That same person thinking they are Clint Eastwood when they are at work is just a regular old person elsewhere. When you start thinking that you are more important than others that is the time to you need to start to reevaluate your life.

For managers and bosses

 

Schedule regular one-on-one meetings with your employees –
You can’t develop relationships without the investment of time.
Having regularly scheduled one-on-one meetings with each team member will provide the structure you need to spend focused time with each other.
 These don’t have to take a lot of time. Thirty minute meetings every two weeks will usually do the job.


And even more important- LISTEN
Walk around for goodness sake- how in the world can he effectively manage from a office ?
You need to listen and train - on the job and in the moment.
How do people talk on the phone?
Are they respectful?
To be a boss does not mean to boss around.

Are you respectful ?

How are you ON the phone?

Follow me

I have seen it my entire life.. in school and in business..
Some guy stands on a soap box and yells follow me.. don't believe that guy and don't listen to him..in fact you should dislike him.
Listen to ME.. follow ME.

Most times when that happened, even as a young man, I looked the other way...actually ran the other way. I wanted to learn for myself rather than get steered by someone else.
Most times I found that the person yelling had their OWN agenda and the person or idea that they were yelling about actually was positive.

I always brought my children up to not be sheep, do not just follow people for the sake of following somebody or to be a part of the " in crowd ".

Think for yourself.

I can say now that they are grown up and married and have families of their own that they indeed listened I am very proud of the people that they turned in to. They do not follow people for the sake of popularity, they make up their own minds and in the interim they then become the leader NOT the follower. And they lead for the right reasons- to help make a positive difference. They do not pre judge anyone and try to see the good in people.

Today I see it even more unfortunately , people angry and yelling and saying follow me, sign this , do not trust THEM ( who ever they may be ).
Anger sells.
Fear sells.

Back up - stop- look and listen- for yourself.
There is a time to unite and their is a time to look at things individually and judge for yourself.

Follow your gut, your conscience , - give people a chance - speak truth to power.

Small stuff

Don't sweat the small stuff..and remember most stuff is small.

We have a tendency to blow things out of proportion, we take a relatively small thing and let it ruin our day. Most likely because we may be angry over something bigger.

Not only is it a waste of your energy it is counterproductive.

You cannot work the problem if you do not have a clear head and you cannot think clearly if you allow anger to take over.

Most things are small and you do not even realize it until something big happens, like a major health issue or a death of a close loved one.

Then you would do anything to get those small problems back.

Enjoy the day !

Integrity and a Sense of Responsibility

Integrity

Integrity stretches to all aspects of an employee's job. An employee with integrity fosters trusting relationships with clients, coworkers and supervisors. Coworkers value the employee's ability to give honest feedback. Clients trust the employee's advice. Supervisors rely on the employee's high moral standards, trusting him not to steal from the company or create problems.

Sense of Responsibility

A strong sense of responsibility affects how an employee works and the amount of work she does. When the employee feels personally responsible for her job performance, she shows up on time, puts in her best effort and completes projects to the best of her ability.

Work Ethic

The definition of Work Ethic-

 

work eth·ic

noun

noun: work ethic

the principle that hard work is intrinsically virtuous or worthy of reward.

 

 

 

You either have it or you don't-

You can learn it..if you want to learn it.

Most I believe is how you are brought up and what you see from your parents, uncles and adults.

 

Without it you will always struggle.

 

Martin Luther King

VINDICATION

If you always tell the truth then you do not need approval from others or vindication.

When most people get jumpy or over protective it may because they are worried about covering their tracks. So they try to get in front of the story and start to do damage control.

The easy thing to do is to always tell the truth and then you will have less stress in your life. Not to say bad things will not happen because we all have stuff happens to us every day. Some make a mountain out of it they have to yell to everyone so that others know they are working hard and then there are still a group that just go about their day and work the problem.

Telling lies or let's say stretching the truth because contagious and like cheating once you do it- it easy do it again. After all no one got hurt right?

Wrong

You hurt plenty of people but most notably you hurt yourself.

We all find ourselves at times at that crossroads - take the right road.

Be a Mentor to somebody

Be a Mentor- pay it forward- did someone help you learn your trade ?

Here are some tips to being a good mentor-

Often mentors do most of the talking, since they are in the teacher role. A mentor who is a skillful listener will be able to fine tune their instruction based on the needs of the team member. They will also be better able to pick up on subtle changes in motivation or confidence.

Ask Powerful Questions
Mentors like to help—that’s why they are mentors. Sometimes the most helpful approach is not fixing the problem or giving the answer. A mentor who is skilled at asking the right questions will be able to draw out the thinking of the other person and help them come to their own solutions. This fosters independence rather than dependence.

Skilled mentors use a variety of tools and techniques based on the needs of the people they are mentoring. There are times when providing clear direction and solutions to problems is completely appropriate—however, once a team member has the knowledge needed to perform, a mentor versed in coaching techniques can encourage independence and increased performance overall.

A good mentor teaches knowledge and skills. A great mentor uses coaching skills to develop the team member into a self-reliant achiever

Take Responsibility

Take Responsibility 

A owner operator's responsibility for his crew's activities is pretty close to absolute.
When you are the manager or boss and something goes wrong, there’s no one to blame. Who could you blame? An employee or crew member who goofs up is someone you chose for your job.

 They are a member of your team.

Every great thing and every less-than-sensational thing they do is a reflection of your leadership.
Strong leaders take responsibility for everything that happens on their job — the good and the bad. They don’t blame others for mishaps — after all, those mishaps happened on their watch!

It isn’t hard to shift your focus from fear and control to trust. It only takes patience and self-awareness.

It requires you to trust yourself enough to trust your crews and fellow employees.

Can you step into your power in 2016, put the hammer down and lead with a human voice?

Do not react in the moment

Careful Not to React in the Moment

Work is an easy place to show strong emotions. Everyone is under pressure at work, and when something goes haywire the easiest thing for a manager to do is to get angry. Fearless leaders don’t do that.

What good would it do to start yelling at people? A fearless leader’s focus is not on judgment and blame but rather on keeping the Team Mojo level high. They know they’ll get to the bottom of whatever went wrong.

They’ll figure out what didn’t work correctly in their system and they’ll fix it. Then they’ll say “It’s good that we had that meltdown last Thursday — it gave us the chance to fix our process and  system, which we wouldn’t have done otherwise.”

Get over it

Get over the idea that making mistakes=being stupid.

When a couple of researchers were observing a Japanese classroom back in the 70s they were astounded to see a student very calmly work through a problem on the chalkboard, in front of his peers, for 45 minutes. They were amazed to realize that they felt more uncomfortable for him than he felt himself!

A prominent idea in the West, especially America, is that abilities like intelligence are largely innate. The Japanese, on the other hand, see intelligence as a function of effort. Thus, when Americans make mistakes, they see it as a failure of who they are, while the Japanese view mistakes as simply part of the learning process and evidence that you can work through something and improve.

Students praised for how bright and talented and special they are end up as adults who struggle to take personal responsibility for their mistakes. Admitting to any kind of failure feels like admitting that they’re not the exceptional person their parents told them they were.

The more you see success not as a function of inherent traits, but of effort and work, the less threatening making mistakes becomes.


 “Learn to see mistakes not as terrible personal failings to be denied or justified, but as inevitable aspects of life that help us grow, and grow up.”

Owning up to your Mistakes

The Bottom Line: Owning up to our mistakes allows us to take responsibility for our lives.

 If we can’t accurately perceive who we are, how we behave (and how others behave towards us), and how our behavior affects others and our own lives, life will always feel like something that’s happening to us, rather than something we are in control of. Men with an internal locus of control  — those who believe they can shape life through their own decisions and actions — are more confident, more likely to seek learning and be leaders, more disciplined, and better able to deal with stress and challenges.

 Men with an external locus of control, on the other hand, believe the course of their life is determined by luck and other people, and see themselves as victims. They are prone to problems with both their physical and mental health, and often plagued by stress, anxiety, and depression. When they make mistakes, they are apt to think, “Why is this happening to me?”

Men with an internal locus of control are achievement-oriented and more likely to find academic and professional success.

Instead of remaining in a childish mindset, they grow into mature manhood. Instead of seeing themselves as the victim and blaming others for their failures, they learn from their mistakes and use them as stepping stones to getting stronger and moving ahead

Your Mistakes

We often hide our mistakes
from other people because we worry they will think less of us once they’ve seen that we’ve messed up.

But, frankly acknowledging your mistakes, apologizing for them, and then earnestly working to make things right almost always has the opposite effect – people respect you for it.
There might still be consequences, of course, but people will appreciate your honesty.
If they use your confession as a way to belittle and use you, those are probably not the kind of people you want to work/live with anyway.

 It’s actually when you hide your mistakes, and they’re found out anyway, that people lose their respect and their trust in you.

The WHY

1. Why do we lose the why?

The why is often lost in the daily grind of nit-picky issues and humdrum operations. Shiny objects come along to distract us, a fleeting rainbow catches our eye and makes us question the color choice for our logo and repetitions grind us down, until we wake up one day and can’t quite remember why we started this whole thing in the first place. That’s when we need to get back to the basic why and recharge.

2. What’s the point, anyway?

Sometimes people just stumble into their work, but most of the time there was some kind of impetus that got us geared up enough to kick-start something. There was a spark that led us to turn that singular idea into an actual first step, an inspiration strong enough to make us want to extend a sprint into a committed marathon. The why is what made us get started.

To heck with them

The heck with them ( or whatever adjective you want to use besides heck).

That is our natural response when we get angry at someone or a group of people.
Rather it is family or work or friends.
The easy out is get angry and to write them off- screw them- who needs them.
Most times we react that way because we are hurt and rather then deal with the feelings or God forbid admit that we may be somewhat at fault we swear them off.

If we continue to do that throughout our lives we miss out and our circle gets of friends get smaller.
I fully understand that reaction but if we accept that fact that WE may be partially at fault and take the time to play it back in our head we may have a different reaction.

The true challenge is not to push people away when we have these moments but to try to learn from them.
To do that we may need to shut up and back away and address it at a different time. Don't e so reactionary. Remember most times you are either acting out of anger or being hurt or deep down we may even know that we messed up and we react that way to cover up.

Take note next time you say this or want to say it- back away - STOP- LOOK AND LISTEN.
You just may learn from it and become stronger for it.
Rather than- to heck with them- maybe you should say - How can I do better ?

Some tips on Getting Motivated

One Goal. Whenever I’ve been in a slump, I’ve discovered that it’s often because I have too much going on in my life. I’m trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It’s probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It’s not possible — I’ve tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that’s hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you’ve accomplished your One Goal.

Find inspiration. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories. Zen Habits is just one place for inspiration, not only from me but from many readers who have achieved amazing things.

Get excited. This sounds obvious, but most people don’t think about it much: if you want to break out of a slump, get yourself excited about a goal. But how can you do that when you don’t feel motivated? Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I’ve learned that by talking to my wife about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I’ve done that, it’s just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.

5 tips for Life

Want to be a better boss ? Parent ? Leader?

 

These are the 5 quick tips for life..

1- Explanation 

2- Demonstration

3- Execution 

4- Repetition  

 

5- Motivation 

Don't just demand- EXPLAIN

Don't just explain- demonstrate through your ACTIONS

Don't just demonstrate FOLLOW THROUGH

Don't just do it do it once in a while - ALWAYS DO IT

Don't just do it to do it - do it to MOTIVATE - yourself as well as them

Lay Away

Do you remember Lay Away ?

When you did not have enough money to buy something so you went to a store and you put money down on it and asked to Lay it away and you would put money down on it till you paid it off then you took it home.

That was before we allowed credit cards into our lives and we allowed debt to come into our lives.

Credit Card was the beginning of allowing us to live above our means.
It use to be that you saved up for what you wanted and then you bought it- simple right?

I fear those days and that mentality is lost forever. Our kids and our kids kids will never have that foundation to draw on.

In the same vein when there was Law Away and no credit cards we also had to warm things up on the stove- we had no microwave- imagine our kids having to live without a microwave.

Thus lies the challenge- in a world where you can get what you want anytime you want and you can nuke your food in seconds - why wait ?
Our kids and grandkids are brought up in a world where they need no patience and they think nothing of adding up debt on credit cards and buying frozen food with all kind of additives in it and heating it up in 2 minutes and away they go.

Personally I think we need to get back to Lay Away mentality - if you want it- save for it.
It wouldn't hurt to buy fresh and use the stove top either.

1963

This Was the Year…1963 U.S. President & Vice President John F. Kennedy

The Vice President

Lyndon Johnson Time Magazine Person Of The Year


Martin Luther King, Jr.

Cost of Living Cost of Food New House $12,650 Granulated Sugar $ .90 for 10 lbs

Average Income $ 4,396 Milk $ 1.04 per gallon

New Car $ 3,233 Ground Coffee $ .85 per pound

Gallon of Gas $ .29 Bacon $ .69 per pound

Movie Ticket $ 1.25 Eggs $ .32 per dozen Popular Movies Born This Year
Tom Jones (Academy Award® winner) Brad Pitt

The Great Escape Whitney Houston

It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad World Michael Jordan

The Pink Panther Johnny Depp

National and World News   Pope John XXIII died on June 3. Pope Paul VI was elected.

 On November 22, President Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, TX.  Two days after Kennedy’s assassination, Jack Ruby murdered the sus-pected killer, Lee Harvey Oswald.


 Alcatraz federal penitentiary, known as "The Rock," closed.

Popular TV Shows Music  Bonanza Walk Like a man (The Four Seasons)

The Beverly Hillbillies It’s My Party (Lesley Gore)

The Ed Sullivan Show Go Away Little Girl (Steve Lawrence)

The Danny Thomas Show Blue Velvet (Bobby Vinton)  Sports Champions   Los Angeles Dodgers (baseball)  San Diego Chargers & Chicago Bears (football)


 Parnelli Jones (Indianapolis 500)

 Toronto Maple Leafs (hockey)

 Boston Celtics (NBA)

 Chateaugay (Kentucky Derby)

 

Changing The Past

The past is the past for a reason
That is where it is supposed to stay
But some cannot let it go
In their heads it eats away

Until all their focus becomes
The person that they used to be
The mistakes they made in their life
Oh, if only they could see

That you cannot change what happened
No matter how hard you try
No matter how much you think about it
No matter how much you cry

What happens in your lifetime
Happens for reasons unknown
So you have to let the cards unfold
Let your story be shown

Don't get wrapped up in the negative
Be happy with what you have been given
Live for today not tomorrow
Get up, get out and start living

Because the past is the past for a reason
It's been and now it is gone
So stop trying to think of ways to fix it
It's done, it's unchangeable, move on

Source: http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/changing-the-past#ixzz3vd05itu3
#FamilyFriendPoems

To move from a reactive approach

With reactive management, also called "firefighting," managers spend most of their time dealing with problems instead of focusing on long-term planning.
Reactive management is stressful and inefficient. It can lead to high staff turnover in your team, and, in time, will lead to serious under-performance.
To move from a reactive approach to a more proactive one:

• Take back control of time.
• Look at processes.
• Understand and manage risk.
• Focus on morale.
• Build in continuous improvement.

Keep in mind that reactive management is necessary at times. However, it can be destructive when it becomes the norm in a team or organization