Hmmmm

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog. I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

Velcro - what a rip off!

Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.

Venison for dinner? Oh deer!

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

Dream

Some men see things as they are and say why - I dream things that never were and say why not." -
-- George Bernard Shaw

• "If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton. You may as well make it dance."
• "The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor; he takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them."
• "If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas."
• "Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends."
• "The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can't find them, make them."

Violence

By Robert Kennedy...

What has violence ever accomplished? What has it ever created? No martyr's cause has ever been stilled by an assassin's bullet. No wrongs have ever been righted by riots and civil disorders. A sniper is only a coward, not a hero; and an uncontrolled, uncontrollable mob is only the voice of madness, not the voice of reason. Whenever any American's life is taken by another American unnecessarily - whether it is done in the name of the law or in the defiance of the law, by one man or a gang, in cold blood or in passion, in an attack of violence or in response to violence - whenever we tear at the fabric of the life which another man has painfully and clumsily woven for himself and his children, the whole nation is degraded.

More on Letting Go...

This was left in the comment section on our blog on the posting of Letting Go but I liked it so much I had to share it as it's own posting....



"It is funny because when your kids are real small that first separation anxiety comes when you drop them off to day care and then pre-school."I remember my oldest sons first day away.....He looked at me with tears in his eyes,did not want to go,when asked why....(this is a classic)"I don't know how to read?".I simply explained that this is where you get to LEARN how to read.

Be the Change

Be the change that you would like to see.

It is easy to criticize and complain but if you want things to change it has to begin with you.
Change your attitude...turn the other cheek. Swallow your pride and give people a second chance or a third or a fourth.

It is much better then the alternative, joining the negative crowd and doing nothing.

What can you do ? What can you say ? What programs can you suggest or help develop ?
Before you bring up a negative be ready with a positive solution or at least a idea or suggestion.

BE THE CHANGE THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE

Letting Go

Sometimes Letting Go can be very hard...

Rather you watch a student graduate or an employee take more control or your child go to school for the first time letting go can be very difficult....but essential.

That is why you need to enjoy every moment and make the most of your time and your teachings because that day will come and should come and if you did your job correctly and will help all parties grow.

It is funny because when your kids are real small that first separation anxiety comes when you drop them off to day care and then pre-school. For me I will never forget the first time my first born backed out of the driveway at 16. She only may have went to the store down the street but it seems like she was gone for days. Letting go is tough.

Then there is the first day you drop them off at college...and then the big one...when you walk them down the isle when they get married....each time you have to let go and each time you feel it deep down.
And it doesn't stop there...because then they bless you with grandchildren.

You worry... you worry because you care.

Same in the workplace, sought of, the feeling of course is intensified with family but if you care about your employees or people that you work with than you want them to succeed and you watch their backs.

That is what life is all about..caring and sharing. If you want to have true success for yourself help others achieve their dreams and goals and your rewards will be plentiful.

Teach em, help em...care for them and show them that you care .. and then eventually you have to let them go...

" I have not failed "

The Fear of Success

The fear of success credo might go something like this: " If I really try to achieve a goal and don't do it, then I would of failed. If I don't really try to succeed then I won't have failed". Sounds kind of silly when you put it that way, doesn't it? In reality this presents many people from succeeding because they see trying hard at something as being risky.

You have to risk possible failure by trying, perhaps that's true, but you are guaranteed failure by not trying !

The persistent Thomas Alva Edison famously said about his idea for the light bulb: " I have not failed. I've found 10,000 ways that won't work". He never considered giving up and now we have him to thank when we switch on a light.

No one does anything perfectly all the time, although it may sometimes appear that others do when you're watching them from the outside.

Success does not come from perfection; it comes from consistently moving in the right direction, which eventually brings you where you want to be, and that is something you really don't need to fear.

Why did the Little Girls ?

BY HARRY CHAPIN....

Why did the little girls grow crookedWhile the little boys grow tall?
The boys were taught to tumbleThe girls told not to fall

The girls answered the telephonesThe boys answered the calls
That's why little girls grew crookedWhile the little boys grew tall

Why did the little girls grow crippledWhile the little boys grew strong?
The boys allowed to come of ageThe girls just came along

The girls were told to sing harmoniesThe boys could all sing songs
That's why little girls grew crippledWhile little boys grew strong

Why did the little girls come brokenWhile the little boys came whole?
And the little boys all were set aflameAnd the girls told to fan the coals

The boys were told to be themselvesThe girls were told play roles
That's why little girls came brokenWhile little boys came whole

Why were all the little girls all frightenedTo be just what they are?
The boys were told to ask themselvesHow high, how far?

The girls were told to reach the shelvesWhile the boys were reaching stars
That's why little girls were frightenedTo be just what they are

And still they bled for us all as the moon rode the skyThey carried our seed when our need ran high
Then they fed all our children in the night as they criedWomankind wept as mankind died

Why were all the little girls left hurtin'When all the boys were done?
And then left there in the moonlightWhen the boys went to meet the sun

And when the girls were openWhy had the little boys all won?
That's why little girls were hurtin'When all the little boys were done

Why did the little girls grow crookedWhile the little boys grew tall?
It's maybe because the little boysDidn't ever have to grow up at all

Where are the little girls? Where are the little girls?
They all are grew crooked, they are crippled
We left broken, we made them frightenedThey all are hurtin'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KcbbzsRhZs

4- Pretend you have unlimited money

4. Pretend you have unlimited money.

My favorite way to solve a problem is to ask myself, What would Victoria do? There is no way Victoria Beckham puts up with the level of problems I do. If Victoria needs a stamp, she doesn’t think twice, she hands the letter to someone else. I tell myself that for every problem I have.

So, I’m in the car sixteen hours a week, and I start thinking, What would Victoria do?

First, I tried doing coaching calls during my car ride. But I kept losing my concentration and missing my exits. I couldn’t program the GPS, so I bought two iPhones—one for talking to me about directions and the other iPhone for coaching. But I got frustrated only people in Australia want to talk that late at night.
Then, I tried listening to books on tape. But I’m a really fast reader and it just frustrated me how slow it was. Then I tried hiring a driver, but the social demands of being with a driver for sixteen hours a week were too much. Then, I decided to dictate blog posts to Melissa. And look, that’s how I did this one.

3- Try things you don’t like.

3. Try things you don’t like.

William Falk, the editor of The Week always has a mini-essay on page five. He’s become one of my favorite writers. Last week, he wrote about the research explaining why older people don’t try new things as much as younger people do. It made me realize that the last few big changes I made in my routine came from trying something that was originally repugnant to me.
For example, I was giving a speech at the Natural Foods Expo and this guy came up to me afterward. He said he loved my blog and he brought a sample of his product for me to have. Foosh. That’s the name of the product.
I said, “Oh, I’ll check out your booth on the floor.” And he said, “I don’t have a booth, because this isn’t really a natural product, it’s got other stuff in it.” I was totally grossed out, but I said thank you, and put it in my bag, because that’s what you do to show good social skills.

Two months later, when I was cleaning out that same bag, I found the sample again. I was hungry, and tired, and I thought, why not? So I tried one. They’re caffeine supplements. They’re caffeine pills, but they have other stuff in them (I’m scared to look). I’ve gotten addicted to them, I’ve ordered Foosh boxes from Amazon like I’m Costco, stocking up.
And it made me think, why do people drink coffee? It’s got a lot of calories (because I don’t drink it black) and it just makes me want sugar, and the sugar makes me want more sugar, and if I have a sugary mint instead, it makes everything after it taste yucky. So it’s much better to have caffeine in a mint than coffee with sugar. Also, the last time I complained about having to put sugar in my coffee, someone told me to buy Illy coffee. It has really snappy packaging, but it’s not as good as Illy coffee with sugar.

2- Practice asking why

2. Practice asking why.

The problem with asking why is that you often get answers that are really inconvenient. For example, why do we give boys a circumcision? I spent nine months arguing this with my ex-husband before my first son was born.

The benefit to asking why over and over again is that eventually you come up with innovative solutions. At the beginning of my adventures in homeschooling, everything seemed terrible. I was scared to put my kids in school, I was scared to teach my kids curriculum, I was scared not to teach my kids curriculum. The trick is to hold two competing things in your head: what you wish to be true, and what looks like the actual truth.

 The benefit of asking why and sticking with it is that you’ll come to a new and innovative solution to make things clear in your head.

1- Act like you have Aspergers.

1. Act like you have Aspergers.

Okay, I know it’s a cheat, because people with Asperger’s don’t understand social conventions, but still, the number-one thing to do if you want to be a creative problem-solver is to not let yourself be constrained by social conventions.

The point of social conventions is to get everybody to act in predictable ways. What this means is that people with Asperger’s Syndrome are usually offensive, because they are unpredictable, but they see things in new ways.

 Try it.

Non-scientific evidence that Aspergers leads to creative problem-solving is that Silicon Valley is a magnet for people with Asperger’s. But also, I was talking to an editor at the New York Times, and he said, “You know how people say that the Jews rule the world? It’s not true. People with Asperger’s rule the world.” (I might argue that it’s a fine line, as I have a hunch based on no documentation that Aspergers is an affliction the Jews have selected for. Think about Shtetl life: whoever memorizes the most Torah gets the best wife.)

How to be a creative problem-solver

I love this one ...I can not take credit for it but I totally agree with it..follow it today and my next few postings....

I get so many books in the mail to review, and the way I evaluate which ones are worth my time is to first read the jacket flap. So I’m not even going to pretend that I have read Tipping Sacred Cows, by Jake Breeden, but I’m going to tell you that it has an amazing jacket flap.
He lists sacred cows in corporate life that we should reconsider:
Balance: Disguising indecision as a bland compromise that attempts to achieve many things but ends up accomplishing nothing
Collaboration: Creating a culture of learned helplessness with little individual empowerment and accountability
Excellence: Spending too much energy producing perfect work instead of developing the quick-and-dirty solution needed now
Fairness: Keeping score and evening the score to make sure no one gets more than their “fair share”
Passion: Racing down a path seeking success only to find burn-out and misbehavior instead
The reason I love this list is because so much of being creative at work is looking for things that are opposite or things that clash. Breeden picks a list of workplace words that we think are intrinsically positive, and he shows us how they’re jargon. The act of looking at things in their opposite light is the best skill to have if you want to be a creative problem-solver.
When I told this to Melissa, she said, “You need to link to Leonardo da Vinci writing backwards.” So here it is. But that’s not that practical for you.

So I’m going to tell you four ways I’ve taught myself to think counter-intuitively.....check out the next few postings ....it is good stuff.. trust me..absorb what you can..

Downtime

Downtime is critical to brain function.  It is different from “rest”; it isn’t doing nothing, rather it is doing nothing that has a pre-defined goal.  This state is not very well understood, though certainly it is not something that is encouraged in our culture.  However, all the research points to the fact that good things happen in the brain when you let it roam about unfettered.  Insight is often preceded by disconnecting from goal directed thinking; how many of your great ideas popped into your head while in the shower?

 This is not just you, it is a common experience that sometimes the best way to solve a problem is to walk away from it.

It is currently thought that down time permits integration between the left and right brain and ultimately leads to creative problem solving and better decisions.  So next time you have an opportunity for a “nothing” moment, seize it, and relax into it.  It isn’t evidence of a character flaw; rather it is a much needed mode for your brain to operate at its best.

It is OK to Fail

It is OK to fail...that is how we learn.

It is better to have tried and failed then never to have tried at all.

People will point at you and may put you down but normally those are the people that sit on the sidelines while you are doing the hard work. Do not let it get you down. As long as you are trying your very best and you intentionally do not hurt anybody you can not go wrong.

If you mess up - learn from it and move on.

 If those that sit on the sidelines criticize- take a breath and realize exactly who they are. Do not let their words hurt you because that is their only offense, that is really all they know. Allowing their words to penetrate only gives them power that they do not deserve.
After all they have not even earned it.
 Do not give your power to them.
Take a deep breath, form your own words correctly, for a battle of words with them will only slow you down and get you no where.

Keep working hard...It is OK to fail....work-learn and try to help others-

Talk TO people...

Talk TO people.... not AT them.. and you will get better results.

Do not talk down to people or around them because they will feel that and be turned off.
You may even do it and not even realize that you are doing it. You may not mean anything by it and could just be too busy. But remember that not only do you offend the person that you are barking orders at but you send a message to all those in ear shot.

It does not matter what your title is who you may " think " you are. In the grand scheme of things you are NO different than everybody else.

When you climb down form your own self absorbed importance and work WITH those around you you will accomplish more and may even learn more along the way.

Interesting

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & Sold to the tannery.......if you had to do thi...s to survive you were "Piss Poor"

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot......they "didn't have a pot to piss in" & were the lowest of the low

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June.. However, since they were starting to smell . ...... . Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting Married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.. Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water!"

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof... Hence the saying "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, "Dirt poor." The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a thresh hold.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old. Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would Sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive... So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

From a speech...

Below is portion of a speech from Bruce Springsteen on 2012. He was directing it to mostly musicians but I think we can all pull from it..

Don't take yourself to seriously.
Take yourself as serious as death itself.
Don't worry.
Worry your ass off.
Have iron-clad confidence....but doubt....it keeps you awake and alert.
Believe that you are the baddest ass in town...... and that you suck!... It keeps you honest.
Be able to keep two completely contradictory ideals alive and well inside of your heart and head at all times.
If it doesn't drive you crazy, it will make you strong.
And when you walk on stage tonight to bring the noise, treat it like it's all we have- and then remember it's only rock 'n' roll.

Achieve Your Dreams Despite “What If”

by Madeleine Blanchard in self leadership, training and deveopment for the Ken Blanchrad company.


A client who is writing a book hit a wall today and called me up.  Part of her research for the book involves getting people to fill out a comprehensive survey that requires a fair amount of thought. Her goal is to have 100 completed surveys. She is running into trouble asking people to fill out the survey.  Every time she wants to ask she finds herself swept away by a rock slide of “What If’s”.

“What if they don’t want to fill it out?”
“What if they say yes, but then forget or regret it?”
“What if I never end up writing the book?”
“What if I write the book and it is no good?”
“What if I publish the book and no one buys it?”
“What if I publish the book and reviewers say mean things about it and me?”
“What if?”
“What if?”
“What if?”
We are so creative and productive when it comes to finding ways to keep ourselves moving forward aren’t we?
So we considered a few ways to push the rocks away, and the main thing we found was to answer the “What if ?” question with a “So what?”
To achieve your goals, keep one eye on the end game, and one eye on the task at hand. When that little voice starts asking what will happen when you fail or hit obstacles talk back with “so what?” Figure that the unexpected will happen, and that you’ll deal with it when it happens.  And keep moving

I never knew

I never knew growing up that my family or experience growing up was any different.

When you are young you do not think of that, it is not until you get into your late teens and experience more of the outside world that is realize that many grow up in very different situations.
Some people are born into money, some kids grow up in a abusive household, some have one parent or no real home.

You never know this when you are a kid, you accept  the world around you. It is a eye opening experience when you hear other stories.
Many people have a story to tell and you learn that you are not alone in many respects and you may even learn that as bad as you thought you had it there is always worse.

I do believe that we all can learn from our past and our upbringing. There are reasons for everything. What slows down the learning process is when we blame others or hold hatred in your hearts.
Learn from your past, from your upbringing.

 Embrace it.......and it is never to early or too late....

Stop with the the complaining and pointing and wondering -why you ?- or wishing you had someone else life. Understand that everybody has their cross to carry and their burdens and heartaches.

Concentrate on you and you alone, set your goals and stay on coarse. You can and will be the person that you want to be and have the family that you want. It is all up to you .

Nobody told me

Nobody told me growing up that I COULD reach certain goals or what goals I SHOULD strive for.

My parents were born in the early 1900's , my mom lived in early childhood with lanterns to light up her home and a outhouse in the back of her house. Her dad had a good size garden in which they mostly lived of off. Both my parents lived through the great depression and my father's family was bitten by the alcoholism bug. His brother died at an early age from it and it quickened my father's death.
Both my parents were good people that worked hard their whole life and tried to not hurt others, though through alcoholism my father hurt himself and those that loved him but we know what the disease can do to you, but he never intentionally set out to hurt anyone and he got up to work everyday.

They never set goals for me and let me know the education was important or that college was not only obtainable but needed. In their eyes if you had a job that was good enough. Just work hard and be honest. That was the foundation they poured. Looking back sure I wish they had showed me more of a path and help set goals but to them college was something for the rich. There was no way they could help pay and had no way to even know how to start the process so it was not their fault.

Kids need direction and someone to encourage and show them the path. They are never to young. Allow them to reach for the stars. There is nothing out there that is not obtainable.

I had to learn all of that on my own. Again through no fault of my parents it was just a different generation. They literally grew up not knowing where their next meal would come from, do you really think they had the opportunity to dream big? Dreaming was a hot meal on a winter's night.

Yes, many of our inner city kids and others in small Town America that still feel this today and yet we expect them to go to school and college and to get a education.

Reach out to them if you can, encourage them. Never mind your money, your words and actions are worth much more. Let them know that they CAN do it, that they can obtain whatever they dream. Start when they are young and continue to make it a mantra ... if they can dream it they can obtain it.

Re-Set Expectations

One of the biggest challenges that faces this generation is how to harness technology.

Re-setting expectations.

Because of the smart phones, email, tablets and lap tops we are all tethered to our work place now 24/7- When we are home we are still working. When we are on vacation we are still working. When we sit down with the family for dinner we are still working.

Our bosses and employers and customers expect us to answer email with minutes and supply answers.

In order to re-charge and have any semblance of a family life we need to shut it down.

Easier said then done at times when someone is looking over your shoulder wanting your job or you need that sale to reach your goal or just to maintain a paycheck.

We all need to Re-set our expectations and realize that to be more productive you need to have a good balance of work and family and personnel life.

Because it is more of a dog eat dog world out there and competition is growing to just obtain a job I do not know how or when this goal of re-setting expectations can be obtained.

I do know that for the good of this generation and the next we do need to find a way.

Family has to be more important. It must be our overall goal and priority. Your goal should be that you work so you can live- you do not work live so you can work.

We all get ourselves to a point that we want more and in the process we tend to live above our means and live on credit therefore we owe therefore we need to work more.

Want less- Prioritize- what is important- that answer should always be FAMILY-

Remembering Paul Arpin

In February 2011, the Moving & Storage Institute pre-sented its prestigious Lifetime Achievement Award for Distinguished Service posthumously to Paul G. Arpin, Sr., former chairman of the Arpin Group, Inc. The award was accepted by Mr. Arpin’s son David, president and CEO of Arpin Group and current AMSA board chair.

Born and raised in Rhode Island, Paul began working in the family business at a young age under the tutelage of his parents and grandparents. Upon returning home from WWII, Paul, a D-Day survivor, began working at the company full-time and succeeded his grandfather as president in 1945.

Throughout his career, Paul’s goal was not to build the biggest moving company, but to build the best. His inspiration to grow the company so the customer received the most value for every dollar spent was paramount. Through his compassion and tenacity, and by combining the best people in the industry for one goal — to provide superior customer service — he knew that he would develop a loyal customer base that would span generations. Today, adults whose parents relocated the family using the Arpin Group are turning to the company again to help move. It is a testimony to Paul’s leadership that the business, originally established in 1900 by his grandparents, continues to "[Create] Customers for Life."<sup>SM

Paul understood the need to invest in his company. Although he was an "old school" businessman, he hired people to develop the company’s infrastructure to better serve customers, agents and drivers, and to remain competitive. Paul also recognized that drivers are the lifeblood of the industry, and he was always concerned for them and their families. He helped many establish themselves as Arpin agents.

In addition to the success of Arpin Group under his leadership, Paul’s legacy is tied to his many charitable pursuits. He is remembered for his spirit of giving — through countless donations of transportation services and manpower to help facilitate community projects, environmental initiatives to re-duce the company’s carbon footprint, and matching employee contributions to help support a range of meaningful causes.

"May the work I do speak for me" was a deeply felt commitment that was expressed by many who spoke of him at his funeral and wake, following his death in June 2010.

Paul Arpin, Sr.’s legacy and vision continue to live on through the fourth generation of Arpin family members to operate the privately owned company, sons David (Arpin president & CEO) and Peter (executive vice president). These men, along with their father and members of Arpin’s agency family, helped to transform the company into the nation’s fourth-largest household goods carrier group, with strategic service centers located throughout the world.</sup>

RESPECT

I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.”
― Albert Einstein-
It was funny when I saw this quote because this is exactly what I said about Paul Arpin- he always treated everybody with the same respect- rather you were watering his plants or emptying his waste paper basket or sitting across from his desk as a prospective agent or driver.

Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov-
-Unfortunately I have run across this more times then I would like to admit- people that lie so much they start to actually fully believe the lie. These people are the hardest to help.

“Friendship- my definition- is built on two things. Respect and trust. Both elements have to be there. And it has to be mutual. You can have respect for someone, but if you don't have trust, the friendship will crumble."
(Mikael Blomkvist-

“How would your life be different if…You stopped making negative judgmental assumptions about people you encounter? Let today be the day…You look for the good in everyone you meet and respect their journey.”
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

“It's very dramatic when two people come together to work something out. It's easy to take a gun and annihilate your opposition, but what is really exciting to me is to see people with differing views come together and finally respect each other.”
― Fred Rogers, The World According to Mister Rogers: Important Things to Remember

Got Ethics? The Five P’s of Ethical Power

There is but one place where people without any problems reside—the cemetery. The only people without problems are dead, otherwise, for people like me and you…we’ve got problems! The question is, do we have ethics? Do we have the moral principles or values in place to guide our decisions when faced with ethical dilemmas or difficult situations?

From Ken Blanchard's book- The Power of Ethical Managemnet.....


Purpose—Your purpose is the road you choose to travel, the meaning and direction of your life. It’s the driving force of why you do what you do. For some it may be rooted in their spiritual faith. Others may find their purpose is something they feel called to do, such as serving those in need, raising responsible children, or leaving the world a better place than they found it. Aligning the activities of your life according to your purpose gives you a clear sense of direction, so when you’re faced with challenging circumstances or difficult decisions, you’re able to filter those occasions through the lens of your purpose and make choices that keep you on track.

Pride—Unlike false pride, which stems from a distorted sense of self-importance that causes people to believe and act like they are better than others, a healthy sense of pride springs from a positive self-image and confidence in one’s abilities. A proper sense of pride mixed with a good dose of humility is the balance you’re seeking. Being driven by false pride causes you to seek the approval and acceptance of others which can overly influence you to take the easy way out when faced with a tough situation.

Patience—Patience is in short supply in our culture.
Giving in to instant gratification is one of the biggest temptations we face and it causes us to make decisions that aren’t in alignment with our purpose and values. Enduring the struggles and challenges life throws our way helps develop the strength of our character.

Persistence—This component of ethical power is about staying the course, staying true to your purpose and values. Persistence is about commitment, not interest. When you have interest in something you do it when it’s convenient. When you’re committed, you do it no matter what!
 When it comes to making ethical decisions, there is never a right time to do the wrong thing. Persistence keeps us on the straight and narrow path.

Perspective—All the other elements of ethical power emanate from the core of perspective. Perspective is about having the big picture view of situations and understanding what’s truly important. Too often we make snap decisions in the heat of the moment and neglect to step back and examine the situation from a bigger perspective. Maintaining the proper perspective is also about paying attention to our inner-self and not just our task-oriented outer-self. Taking the time to enter each day with prayer, meditation, exercise, or solitude helps foster self-reflection which is needed to help us maintain the right perspective about life.

Many people believe there is a huge gray area between right and wrong and they use that as rationale to operate by situational ethics. What’s right in this situation may be wrong in the next. I don’t agree.

 I believe in most cases we can distinguish between right and wrong if we take the time to examine the situation and rely upon our ethical power.

TRUST

Just Trust Me

Posted  by lolly daskal fellow blogger on leadership development

Imagine telling someone: “I’m going to be taking you on a long, dangerous, and difficult trip. There will be times you are likely to be very uncomfortable, and there may be terrible storms. I’m not going to tell you where we are going, why we are going, when we are going, or how we will get there. Just TRUST ME. “
How do you think that would make anyone feel?
In organizations, when a leader is implementing organizational change – when a boss is making major decisions that will affect employees – it doesn’t work to say “just trust me.”
Like frightened children, people will come up with all kinds of reasons to resist and refuse why they do not want to come along on the trip – even if it’s a good one!
Most of us, do not want to take trips into the unknown and without a destination.
Telling people “just trust me” is naiveté at its worst.
It shows an enormous amount of disrespect, sometimes even dishonesty. And, maybe even delusional!
In business today, trust has to be earned. In leadership today, trust has to be gained.
Trust is being congruent: Match your words with your actions what you say you will do you do. Being trusted is being dependable.
Trust is embracing transparency. When it comes to trust, the more you reveal the more you can see. When trust is transparent it can be embraced.
Trust is honoring promises. Keep what you promised – and if you can go the extra mile and honor and deliver more than you promised.
Trust is a two-way street. To make someone trustworthy, you need to trust them first. The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.
Trust is risk.Trust lies between faith and probability. To risk is to put yourself out of your comfort zone.Take the risk and have the faith in trust to pull you through.
Trust is a relationship. Trust begins with the self in relationship with another. Trust others as you would wish to be trusted.
Trust is the glue when it comes to organizational change. it is a foundational element that holds us together.
Trust your people so they can engage and be part of the change.
Trust your people so they can enroll and add value to the change.
Trust your people so they can embrace and understand and respect the change.
Lead from within: Any leader who says “just trust me” and expects loyalty is going to get a group of employees who resent the journey instead of enjoying the adventure. Trust grasps another human being in their innermost core of loyalty.

Face to Face

With all of our technology there is still  a lot to be said for face to face conversations.

I totally agree with the CEO of Yahoo when she called all employees back to the work place.
All those that worked from home have to report to work or quit.

There is a lot to be said for face to face conversations, even the occasional times you may stop at a desk or sit and have lunch with a fellow employee. A thought or idea can come when you least expect it.

Call it a serendipitous stumble.

Never mind how impersonal email is and how MANY times it can come across the wrong way, when you are speaking to someone right in front of you it is different. How is say it is as important as what you say.

It can be a casual conversation with nothing to do with work even but you may learn more about your fellow employee and through that you may build a better working relationship.

Technology is great....but you still can not beat a face to face.

Yelling

Just when did " yelling " in business, politics and life become acceptable when holding a discussion.

I really believe that people think just because they yell louder that they " care" more then the guy who is trying to hold a civilized conversation.

It is WRONG...and should NOT be acceptable.
But we allow it.

WHY?



Does it go back to being bullied when we were kids?

Why are people intimidated by those with the biggest mouths?

Most times those that yell and go off the fastest probably do not even know the subject well. I think that is their great cover up. If they intimidate you then they get the floor all by themselves and therefore they end up ruling.

In order to grow in business or have a true democracy and have a better personnel relationship you have to listen to all sides and bend when need be and accept other sides and thoughts.

There should be NO ROOM for bullies or intimidation.

 Stand up for your right to speak your peace and it should not have to be in louder voice... just a clear one.

More On The Road

In case you missed it here is our interview with our Elite Road Driver and professional mover...Skip Austin. Thank you Skip.. hope you enjoy your time off in Hawaii !




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-fSqLVWyMg

The Angel and the Devil

MORE ON CHOICES...

We all have those moments where we can hear the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other.

And you hope you listen to the angel as much as possible ...buuuut..
 in retrospect we know, at times, that we may have made the incorrect choice.

We all do it..hopefully not in " big " decisions but we do.

That is part of being human...learn form it... diminish those times the best you can and move on.

You certainly hope that the older we get the smarter we get.. maybe not in all cases but that should at least be the plan.

You live by your choices and like I said in the last blog - those choices WILL determine your path.

Remember there are NO short cuts and if your decision will hurt others you will ultimately fail.

STOP- LOOK AND LISTEN.....listen to your heart and your head.

You know that right thing to do...